Words with My Uncle
by BobbyJustGotSheared
Summary: Of love, loss, and growing up. This is my story. I am Kotaromaru, the son of one of the greatest demons who ever lived. And died.
1. Prologue: The Lord of the West

**-Prologue-**

**-The Lord of the West-**

"_Hereafter, in a better world than this, _

_I shall desire more love and knowledge of you."__ - William Shakespeare_

**----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------**

_16 June, 1520_

_This is utterly ridiculous. I'm here in my bed chamber, bent over a table with a scribe's pen in one hand, while my other holds in place this… Diary. Honestly, I haven't a clue why any creature would keep such a useless thing. Why record my thoughts when I can just think them? Aunt Kagome said it is so I can share them with others, but if I wanted to do that I'd just talk to them. Really. This is stupid._

_And yet here I am, scratching away at this page anyway, and why? Because Uncle Inuyasha told me I should, even though his thoughts regarding this idiotic book are similar to mine. I believe his exact words were: "Listen, pup. That thing is probably the most damn worthless thing any human ever came up with, but you should use it anyway. You're the tai-youkai, and what you do and say is gonna mean something to youkai who live after you're dead and gone. Besides, that was a gift from Kitami, and she'd be happy to see you writing in it."_

_Poetic, right? In any case, despite Uncle's horrible knack for putting things as bluntly as is possible, he's right. Unfortunately, my life is important. If I were a good diplomat, which at times I am not, I would have started documenting my life years ago, when I was first able to spell, so that my earliest memories would forever be preserved. Alas, they are not. That, however, is easily remedied._

_You see, my childhood and adolescence were tumultuous and certainly not forgettable. Even now every instance of my past remains fresh in my still young mind. So why don't I start from the beginning? Please bear with me, as this will be long and most probably rather cliché, but I assure you that you, whoever you are, will not be bored. And that is a promise from the tai-youkai, who never breaks his promises._

_Signed,_

_Kotaromaru_

_Inu no Taisho and Tai-Youkai of the West_

_---------------------------------------------------------_

_Youkai: demon (roughly translated)_

_Tai-youkai: I suppose this would be the equivalent to "demon lord."_

_Inu no Taisho: "Dog General," the title that Inuyasha and Sesshomaru's father carried when he was alive._

**Disclaimer: **_**Inuyasha**_ **is property of one Ms. Rumiko Takahashi. And thank gosh for that, because if I owned it you would be running for your life. Toodles.**


	2. One: Naraku is the Victor

**-Chapter One-**

**-Naraku is the Victor-**

_"No battle is worth fighting except the last one." - __Enoch Powell_

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_To first understand my story you'll need to know my father's story. His name was Sesshomaru, and he once held the title that I do now. Everything I know about him I learned from my mother and from my aunt and uncle. I am told that he was a great and honorable ruler, despite certain flaws like a thirst for power, and that I am very much like him in appearance and sometimes in demeanor. _

_It's strange, really, hearing Uncle Inuyasha talk about my father – his brother – because they once hated each other with fierce conviction. Fighting over anything and everything, they were bitter rivals. Their biggest conflict was over the Tetsusaiga, Uncle's sword and prized possession. From what I understand, my father often tried to steal the weapon, but was never successful and lost interest in the endeavor after a while. _

_Aunt Kagome speaks of him with a kind of pity and respect that I didn't understand when I was a child. The reason she does so lies in the tale of the final battle against Uncle's most infamous nemesis, Naraku, a filthy bandit-turned-hanyou whelp who caused droves of pain and anger for everyone, human or otherwise. You see, long before I was born, Uncle and his comrades, who were Aunt Kagome, a monk named Miroku, a slayer named Sango and her hellcat Kirara, and a kitsune, Shippo, all traveled everywhere over the country in pursuit of Naraku, for he had wronged each of them in some way. Their journey was long and difficult, and blood was shed in waves, but finally they were indeed triumphant. Naraku, coward that he was, hardly ever did his own dirty work, and so countless numbers of other beings were drawn into his dark web, one of them being my father. _

_Naraku had an incarnation, several of them in fact, but one remains crucial to this story. Her name was Kagura, and she was the first and only woman to ever capture my father's heart. She detested her master and from what I learned, she also cared for my father. _

_There was also a human child who was called Rin. How she came to travel with my father remains unknown to my Aunt and Uncle, but they do know that she was indeed always by his side after he… acquired her. She was the first human my father ever tolerated, and perhaps he even liked her._

_Finally, there was an imp named Jaken, who remained a faithful servant of my father's for quite a long time. I understand that he was quite annoying, and once even tried to steal the Tetsusaiga from my uncle for my father, but he failed, fortunately. _

_When the time came for the ultimate confrontation between Uncle and Naraku, my father, Kagura, Rin, and Jaken were all there. This is the part where my tale grows difficult to tell; for it is not a happy thing I share with you now. Uncle relayed the events to me, and I could feel and even smell the sorrow it caused him to do so… I'll tell you what he told me, and I hope you are not too saddened by it._

**OooOooOooOooO**

The battle of the century, it would be called later. Naraku stood in the center of what had once been a beautiful field, and was now nothing more than a barren plain choked with blood and the smell of death. Around him were the heroes, the warriors who were responsible for tracking down the evil hanyou and engaging him in one final showdown: Inuyasha, the legendary half breed who wielded the Tetsusaiga, Kagome, the strange miko with incredible power, Miroku, the monk with a powerful yet cursed hand, Sango, the woman demon slayer who was the last of her line, Sesshomaru, the youkai lord of the western lands whose demonic swords brought both destruction and life, and Kikyo, the undead miko who had once been the sole guardian of the Shikon no Tama.

If one were to glance overhead the scene they would be greeted by the sight of Kagura, the woman who was the wind. She was suspended in the air on her flying feather, while Kirara, the youkai cat that was Sango's pet and companion, flew in circles around the woman in her large form, growling and bearing her enormous fangs.

Hidden in the trees that lined the battlefield were Lord Sesshomaru's vassals, Jaken and Rin. A few meters away from them was the young fox demon, Shippo. They watched with bated breath as the battle raged, as one after the other, Inuyasha and his comrades fired off attack after attack, most of which were blocked and sent ricocheting back by Naraku. The group was growing ragged and tired, but sheer determination to complete their task drove them on.

"_Wind Scar!"_ Inuyasha roared as he brought the Tetsusaiga down over his head in a big arch, unleashing a powerful wave of demonic energy that barreled toward Naraku. The blow was reflected off an invisible barrier and sent straight towards Kagome. Inuyasha moved like the wind and scooped the miko up and away from the blast, setting her down safely several yards away.

Naraku was growing bored with the onslaught. He'd been hit once, when that foul Sesshomaru had swung at him unexpectedly with his Tokijin. The tai-youkai was fast, and the evil hanyou hadn't been able to dodge the attack in time. He was left with an angry red gash on is right shoulder that bled black, foul smelling liquid. Insolent fool. Naraku decided that Sesshomaru would be the first to suffer his wrath for his impertinence. He waited for Inuyasha to attack him with Tetsusaiga again, and when the assault came he erected another translucent defense that refracted the energy in all directions, including straight up into the sky.

Kagura was directly in the path of destruction, as Naraku had wanted her to be. Sesshomaru's reaction was everything the half breed could have hoped for. The Lord of the West leapt into the air and swept Kagura out of harm's way. And while he was distracted with his task, Naraku took great pleasure in watching another train of demonic power disappear into the woods.

There was a scream, high-pitched and so chilling that it stopped the tai-youkai in his tracks. Then there was nothing.

_No._

With more momentum than he had ever moved before, Sesshomaru sprinted towards the spot that his two traveling companions had once stood. In their place was a huge rut, evidence of the attack that had passed through. There was nothing else. No blood. No flesh. No cloth. But the youkai could smell it, the fear that one who is unprepared for death feels right before they are sent into oblivion. _No._

It couldn't be; it wasn't right. They weren't supposed to be involved. Rin and Jaken… _No._

Naraku wasn't finished yet. While Sesshomaru stood in shocked silence in the cold shade of the trees, the hanyou unleashed a lightning fast tentacle and sent it shooting skyward where it wrapped itself firmly around a horrified Kagura. She yelled and thrashed and tried cutting him with her deadly fans, but her strength was minimal compared to his. But the wind sorceress was not without her resources; she had asked him for help once, and she wasn't beneath doing it again.

"_Sesshomaru!"_

Her call was like ice water to his mesmerized daze, and his head snapped to the side to see the newest development in the fray. Oh no, Naraku would not get away with hurting Kagura. Sesshomaru wouldn't allow it. He jumped towards her, once… Twice… Completely intent on reaching the filthy hanyou and slicing him to ribbons with his bare claws. And he would have, had not he suddenly found himself with one slimy and grotesque tentacle shoved through his stomach. The foreign thing had cut his sash, the one that held his swords in place, in half, and Tokijin and the Tensaiga clattered into the dirt.

Inuyasha, Kagome, Sango, and Kikyo were bombarding Naraku with weapons and the Wind Scar, but their enemy just cackled and deflected every blow. He never took his red eyes off of the tai-youkai that he had suspended on one of his extremities as he made his next move.

With the coppery taste of his own blood in his throat, and completely immobile, Sesshomaru watched, almost as though the events he saw weren't actually taking place, and what his eyes took in made him want to howl.

Naraku smirked in a way that was wholly evil and lowered the tentacle that held Kagura until she was eye level with him and her beloved lord. Then he glanced at Sesshomaru, making sure he had his attention, before plunging another feeler into the place where Kagura's heart was supposed to be. Her scarlet eyes widened, then dulled as if the light behind them had gone out. Her body slumped, lifeless and limp, only seconds before it disintegrated into dust and fell into a pile on the ground.

The unmasked horror on Sesshomaru's face provided pure bliss to Naraku. Successful in his mission, to completely devastate the normally untouchable tai-youkai, the hanyou was thoroughly enjoying himself now. The loss of one of his incarnations was a small price to pay. Besides, he could just make another if he needed to, if his struggle to obtain the Shikon no Tama didn't end with this one battle.

So caught up was Naraku in his celebratory thoughts that he let his guard down. Kikyo was the first to catch the shift. She turned her stern gaze to Kagome, her other self, and nodded once. Now was the time. The young miko from the future relayed the message to Inuyasha and Sango with a glance, and they in turn forwarded it to Miroku. The five of them prepared themselves, mentally and physically. They had to act quickly and precisely. If they waited too long Naraku would reconstruct his defenses. And they knew that if one misplaced blow failed to kill him, the chance to do so would not come again.

Simultaneously, two women with sacred powers knocked their bows with their arrows. A golden eyed hanyou spread his legs and made himself steady on the ground as he held his powerful sword in front of him. A taiji-ya adopted a fighting stance and reaffirmed a strong grip on her giant boomerang – the Hiraikotsu. A monk pulled several ofuda from inside his violet robes and prayed to the gods for victory.

Five unwavering voices rang out over the scene, and anyone who heard them would have been left without a doubt as to who the victors would be.

"_Wind Scar!" _Inuyasha. The Tetsusaiga's power ripped through the air.

"_Take this, Naraku!" _Kagome. A sacred arrow flew.

"_Your life ends now, demon!" _Kikyo. Another arrow followed.

"_Hiraikotsu!"_ Sango. The oversized weapon cut the sky with ease.

"_Evil, be gone!"_ Miroku. The ofuda were thrown.

The attacks came racing from all directions, meeting at one central target: Naraku. As they converged there was an explosion of light that shifted from yellow to blue to pink and back again, forcing everyone to look away from the sight. The evil half breed's scream was agonizing and threatened to swallow them all whole; Kagome dropped her bow and covered her ears. Inuyasha's canine ones flattened to his skull. Then the wretched noise ceased, the glare faded, and Sango's boomerang came soaring back, slightly off course.

Eyes lit with cautious hope, tentative smiles, these were the things that could be seen on the faces of the heroes if one looked around. Hardly daring to draw breath, to even _dream_ that maybe, just maybe-

All that was left in the middle of the barren field was a black, charred mark, as though some flame of Hell had risen and burned the ground.

-Naraku was dead.

"Keh! It's about fucking time that bastard keeled over!" Inuyasha's boastful statement broke the silence. It seemed to snap everyone out of their reveries, and suddenly there was noise and light and a pleasant feeling in the air.

Kagome laughed, the sound filling the atmosphere with beauty and happiness. Shippo raced out of the trees and into her arms. She hugged the kit close to her heart as he cried in relief. Miroku wasted no time in ripping the prayer beads and rosary from his previously cursed hand. The skin beneath the cloth was smooth, unmarred, perfect. The Wind Tunnel was gone. Unable to contain himself, the monk swept Sango up in his arms, laughing loudly as if he had not a care in the world. The taiji-ya giggled softly, for once not worried at all about Miroku's wandering hands. Kirara flew down to the ground and reverted back to her smaller form, watching her mistress with curiosity. Kikyo smiled at Inuyasha, and it was genuine and without malice. With a faint blush that wasn't uncomfortable at all, the hanyou returned the gesture.

Their happy sentiments were interrupted when a canine growl punctured the air. Inuyasha's ears swiveled towards the sound, and his body followed. When his amber eyes met the source, they widened in surprise and a tinge of fear. Sesshomaru, the great tai-youkai, was on his knees in front of the pile of ash that had once been Kagura. He had picked up a handful of the dark gray powder, and it fell through his fingers to the ground, leaving the youkai's palm filthy.

Sesshomaru's eyes, so like his half-brother's and yet so different, started flashing red. The crests on either side of his face were turning jagged and wild. His fangs and claws were lengthening, and Inuyasha would have had to have been a fool to not realize what was happening. Luckily, he wasn't a fool at all.

"Kagome," he addressed the girl, voice low, eyes not moving from his older sibling. "Take Shippo and the others and get away from here. Go to the trees and _don't move._"

"But, Inuyasha-"

"Just go, wench! He's transforming!"

The miko didn't need any more warning than that. Sesshomaru was dangerous enough when he had all his strength in check; when he lost control, he was positively lethal. Kagome beckoned to her companions and with some reluctance they followed her quickly to the cover of the woods. Kikyo, however, remained on the battlefield.

With a look meant to crush any arguments, Inuyasha yelled to the woman, "Get out of here, Kikyo!"

Her gaze was unwavering and fierce when she replied. "No. I can help you, Inuyasha."

Without letting him reply she darted forward and then around until she was behind Sesshomaru. Fate was on her side; she was downwind from him and as long as she remained quiet, he wouldn't notice her. She crept forward slowly, careful not to make a sound or move too fast.

Inuyasha wanted to call out, to gather the miko up in his arms and deposit her in the safety of the trees, but to do so could mean death for her. Besides, she looked like she had a plan, and he was curious. He kept constant vigil over his brother while sneaking glances at Kikyo to assess her movements. She was approaching the spot where Naraku had held Sesshomaru in the air and inadvertently cut his swords off. When she reached the weapons, one of her delicate hands edged down until it had the hilt of the Tensaiga in its grasp. Then Kikyo looked up at the wild youkai, who was appearing more deadly by the second, to make sure that he still had his back to her. Assured that he wouldn't suddenly turn around, she took a small step forward.

Inuyasha's eyes widened when he realized what she planned to do. A worried snarl welled up in his throat and he fought to keep it in. The strategy was a good one, but it was risky. If Sesshomaru happened to see her… How did she plan on staying out of his sight?

By now she was so close to him that if she reached out as far as she could her fingers would brush his Mokomoko-sama. Inuyasha was positive now that there was no way her plan could be executed without Sesshomaru being aware of it. If he was right, Kikyo was going to make it so that the Tensaiga was touching its owner… And then the rest would be Inuyasha's job. He would have to unleash the Wind Scar on his brother, and the Fang of Heaven would protect the tai-youkai, but the blast would still be enough to knock him unconscious.

Kikyo took a step to the right around the youkai in front of her, and it dawned on the hanyou with shocking force that the woman had never meant to hide her presence from the demon lord. No, she would let him see her, let him attack her. She would let Inuyasha hit her with Tetsusaiga's power. She was planning to die.

Now she was in front of Sesshomaru, and he knew full well that she was there. With a vicious growl, purely animalistic and entirely blood-thirsty, he lashed out at her with the razor sharp claws of his right hand. Kikyo reacted quickly, blocking the swipe with Tensaiga. Snarling angrily at the interception of his attack, the inu-youkai gripped the sword to hold his prey in place. He jerked her forward, and lacking the use of his missing left arm, chose to inflict pain with a different part of his anatomy instead. When his fangs sunk into her clay neck, she winced and shouted, "Inuyasha! _Now!_"

But the hanyou couldn't move, couldn't breathe. Broken thoughts made idle attempts to become coherent in his mind, and the end result was this: if he attacked, Kikyo would die. If he didn't Sesshomaru would kill her, and then they would still have a raging youkai on their hands, as well as a dead comrade. Either way, the outcome wouldn't be a good one.

"_Inuyasha!"_

Kikyo's voice was more urgent now. Sesshomaru was holding onto her with all his strength, and it didn't look like her body could take much more of the abuse. It was now or never…

Making his final decision, Inuyasha reared the Tetsusaiga up over his head and closed his eyes, trying to justify what he was about to do. "I… I'm sorry, Kikyo…"

Then the sword came down, and the Wind Scar exploded from the blade. It was over in seconds; the Tensaiga reacted the moment that its fellow's youkai energy reached Sesshomaru. The barrier that the Fang of Life provided was enough to knock the demon lord out cold, just before it teleported him far away from the field to somewhere safe.

Kikyo's body, along with her life and whatever light she had left, was obliterated instantly. But somewhere in the fabricated gusts of the Wind Scar, Inuyasha swore he heard her. Swore that as Kagome raced toward him to wrap him in a tight embrace and ask him if he was okay, there was a whisper in one of his white dog ears that could have only come from the dead miko.

"_Thank you, Inuyasha…"_

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_Hanyou: half-demon_

_Miko: Shinto priestess_

_Youkai: demon (roughly translated, that is)_

_Shikon no Tama: the Jewel of Four Souls_

_Tai-youkai: I suppose that this would be the equivalent to "demon lord."_

_Taiji-ya: slayer_

_Ofuda: These are the sacred seals that Miroku carries, and also the (dysfunctional) ones that Kagome's grandpa has._

_Mokomoko-sama: this is the fluffy boa-ish thing that Sesshomaru wears over his shoulder, and it was named this by Rumiko Takahashi, herself. _

_Inu: dog_

**Disclaimer: **_**Inuyasha**_ **is property of one Ms. Rumiko Takahashi. And thank gosh for that, because if I owned it you would be running for your life. Toodles.**


	3. Two: Sesshomaru's Choice

**-Chapter Two-**

**-Sesshomaru's Choice: Minami-**

_"When you die they make a list  
of every love you never kissed,  
of each regret and each mistake,  
every choice you failed to make."__  
__- Barenaked Ladies__, "Next Time"_

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_Uncle told me that seeing my father in such a state, completely incoherent with rage and despair, was one of the worst experiences of his life. If he didn't have to witness it for another hundred years, it would still be too soon. _

_After the battle Uncle and Miroku, who jumped on Kirara's back, went looking for my father. They found him two miles away in a grove of trees, reverted back to his normal state, but a little worse for wear and still unconscious. Uncle slung him up over the hellcat in front of Miroku and the four of them returned to the battlefield, where Aunt Kagome, Sango, and Shippo were waiting. Together they made the day-long journey home, to Kaede's village. My father didn't wake up the whole time, much to everyone else's relief. Uncle said that he was probably exhausted, and of course there was the huge hole in his stomach to consider. The wound would heal in a couple days with no problem, because Father's poison would fight off any miasma that Naraku had left behind on the skin, but it was still enough to slow him down. _

_Now a little about the place they went back to, Kaede's village. Kaede was an old priestess, the younger sister of Kikyo, and she had guarded the little settlement and the forest around it for quite a while. To this day it is still named after her, even though she died a long while ago, shortly after I was born. It has grown since the days of when it was founded, and especially since Uncle and Aunt Kagome took residence in it. They are widely known as heroes, and because of that people flock to the place to gain some semblance of protection in these troubled times. As my aunt said, it's not called the Warring States Era for nothing. _

_The forest around the village is named after my uncle, and has been since he was pinned to a tree in it almost one hundred years ago. The tree in question is called Goshinboku, and Uncle was sealed fast to it by a sacred arrow fired from the bow of Kikyo, herself. Those were the days before my Aunt Kagome was around; those were the times when Naraku began creating mayhem. For fifty years my uncle was stuck suspended to that immense tree, lost in the loop of time, not aging or feeling the effects of life. It was my aunt who released him, and then their journey began. One by one they gathered comrades, first Shippo, then Miroku, and finally Sango and Kirara. They crossed paths with hundreds of individuals, and sometimes their dealings with them had nothing to do with Naraku at all, but more often than not, they did. There was Yura of the Hair; the fight for Shiori, the bat hanyou; the Band of Seven; and many more. I cannot say I envy my uncle, for his quest was long and hard, and many times they were let down, but I do respect him for all he did. And you know, somewhere inside, though he would never admit it, I think my father did, too…_

**OooOooOooOooO**

Sesshomaru awoke to the quiet sloshing sounds of moving water, and the odd feeling of something spongy being pressed to his abdomen.

He smelled wood, fire, some kind of floral scent, and… his brother's miko. Curiosity got the better of him, and he opened his eyes to find himself staring at the crudely built log roof of a hut. Looking down earned him the sight of the girl he had smelled – Kagome, perhaps her name was – dipping an odd pink thing into a basin of water and then dabbing at his stomach with it. Immediately he noticed two things. One, he was bare chested, and two, the reason that the miko was tending to him was a large open wound just above his midriff. Neither of these things pleased him, and the second one didn't even make sense to him. What had caused such an injury to appear on his person? Thinking back to possible culprits, the tai-youkai found he didn't remember much of anything at all beyond arriving at the place where he was determined to end Naraku's life, and then bidding Jaken and Rin to stay hidden in the trees while he-

_Oh._

A flood of memory, and with it a storm of unwanted and unwelcome emotion, came crashing down around him. Jaken was dead. Rin was dead. The hole in his stomach had been caused by one of Naraku's tentacles, so he could hold the inu-youkai still while he took Kagura's life as well. After that his thoughts became hazy, and Sesshomaru didn't have to be a genius to figure out what had taken place next. He'd transformed, no doubt, and Inuyasha had obviously stopped him, as was proved by the fact that his wench sat right in front of the tai-youkai's eyes. Surely she would be dead, sliced open by his claws, if his half-brother hadn't intervened.

Emotional pain was not something Sesshomaru was accustomed to, and it had been a long, long time since he'd last felt any of it, but nonetheless it came to him in waves as he lay there. Guilt, anger, sorrow, self-loathing. These things danced around him, a cruel mockery and testament to his failure to protect those he should have. A half-growl, half-whine escaped him, and it was only then that Kagome realized he wasn't asleep anymore.

"Oh! Sesshomaru! You're awake… I was just… Um…" Plainly startled by his sudden consciousness, the miko rambled on and on about things that the tai-youkai didn't understand or care about. He gave her a hard look, one meant to shut her up, and she did with a scared little squeak.

He started to sit up, with a bit of difficulty being both injured and without one arm, but Kagome's hand shot out to stop him, landing on his shoulder. With a single warning glare from him, she withdrew it, but still she said, "You shouldn't… Your wound is serious. You need to lie down so it'll-"

"It will heal on its own, girl. I am fine." Ignoring her protests, he finished sitting upright and then got to his feet. Little tendrils of pain scored through him from his stomach, but they weren't enough to deter him from moving.

Seeing that he wasn't going to listen to her, Kagome figured it would be better to just let him do what he wanted, since it did actually appear as though his injury was already starting to repair itself. She turned around and gathered up the clothes and armor she'd removed from him and held them out to the tai-youkai, not daring to meet his stare since she was sure that he wouldn't be happy about being half naked.

He took his possessions from her without a word and donned them quickly with practiced ease. There were, of course, large pieces of cloth missing where he'd been impaled, but those would just have to wait. Something was still absent, however…

"My swords?"

"Oh!" She blushed and retrieved the weapons from their place up against the wall. "Here they are…"

Sesshomaru nodded and took those as well, and since he no longer had a sash to put them in, he just carried them in his hand, before going outside. Wanting to see if his original assumption as to his whereabouts was correct, he lifted his nose to the sky. One cursory sniff confirmed his belief; he was in the village in Inuyasha's Forest. Plus, it was nighttime. That was good. It meant that he could probably leave the place without having to endure the stares that curious villagers would send his way.

In the case of his brother, Sesshomaru wasn't so lucky.

"Oi! Where are you going?"

Inuyasha must have been sitting in his customary cross-legged fashion on the roof of the hut, because he dropped down in front of the tai-youkai, arms stuffed in the sleeves of his fire-rat haori.

"That's none of your business."

"Like hell it's not! I saved your ass and brought you back here! Now where the hell do you think you're going?"

Kagome edged her way around Sesshomaru as she exited the hut and hurried to Inuyasha's side, casting anxious glances between the brothers and worrying her bottom lip with her teeth. Neither youkai nor hanyou was backing down; each stood with their shoulders squared and stubborn, proud looks on their faces.

"Inuyasha… Please… Let him go," Kagome's soft voice broke the stand off. "His injury is already healing. He'll be fine."

Sesshomaru was somewhat surprised by her plea, but he didn't let it show. With an inward sigh, he relented. "I am returning home, Inuyasha. I have no need to be pampered like a pup."

Cocking his head to the side in a decidedly calculating way, Inuyasha regarded his sibling for a minute before responding. "Keh. Fine. Don't get yourself killed, bastard. We haven't settled our score yet."

A nod was all that Sesshomaru spared the hanyou before willing a demonic cloud to form around his feet and lift him into the air. It carried him up, higher and higher still into the sky until the tai-youkai was nothing more than a black silhouette against the shining crescent moon.

**OooOooOooOooO**

Sesshomaru had decided, from the moment he left the little wooden dwelling he'd awoken in, on a plan of action. He thought about the first step as his cloud transported him to his home. There were several scrolls scattered across the desk in his office, one of them an eager proposition from the southern tai-youkai for a mating between Sesshomaru and the demon lord's daughter. Upon first receiving the offer, Sesshomaru had scoffed and immediately cast it aside. He wouldn't be mating anyone until Naraku was dead… Until Kagura was free…

But alas, the wind sorceress was dead, and the inu-youkai had yet to find a mate and produce an heir. He was loathe to let Inuyasha take over the Western Lands, and fairly positive that the hanyou would decline the responsibility anyway. So Sesshomaru needed a son. An engagement to the southern youkai hime was starting to sound like a decent idea.

The demonic cloud dissipated and Sesshomaru touched down on the soft grass outside his extensive castle. He strode through the halls, passing servants and vassals who all stopped to look at him, obviously wondering what had happened while their lord was away, but he ignored them all. He slid open the door to his private quarters, only to be greeted by a twinge in his neck, more of a prickling sensation than an actual pain.

"Detach yourself from my anatomy instantly, flea, and I won't annihilate you."

Myoga didn't need another warning. With a frightened yelp, he hopped onto Sesshomaru's shoulder and looked up at the youkai, mustache quivering.

"My apologies, sire! It's just that I haven't had any full youkai blood in ages and I just-"

"Silence."

"Eep! I'm sorry, m'lord! I didn't mean to-"

"What are you doing here?" Patience quickly waning, Sesshomaru wanted an explanation.

Extremely nervous, Myoga started rubbing his four hands together. "I was just ch-checking in on you, sire…"

"Hn. Now that you have done so, you may leave," the tai-youkai dismissed the flea and made his way to his desk. He scanned his amber gaze over it quickly, making sure everything was how he left it. He sat down, cross-legged, placing his swords beside him, and selected the scroll he was looking for.

Myoga, far from leaving, leaped from Sesshomaru's shoulder and landed on his desk. He squinted, trying to read the kanji on the back of the document that the youkai had just unrolled. "'Daisuke, Lord of the South…' Oh! Why, that's the water demon who controls the lower regions, is it not, sire?"

"Hn."

"Why would he be contacting you? Is there a war happening? I didn't hear anything… Or perhaps he wishes to make a trade? Or-"

"Stop babbling," Sesshomaru ordered, not taking his eyes from the scroll. Daisuke wanted him to marry and mate his daughter, Minami, who was, according to her father's letter, a beautiful, healthy, submissive woman who could bear him many strong pups. Sesshomaru almost snorted. The validity of the words was questionable, as Daisuke himself was no show to look at, but still, the offer was worth taking into consideration.

Retrieving the pen and ink pot from the corner of his desk, Sesshomaru scribbled a response on the bottom of the scroll. He signed his name beneath that and then rolled the letter back up before standing.

"Eh… M'lord? Where are you going?" In his haste to follow the quickly moving tai-youkai, Myoga jumped a little too far and ended up face-first on the floor. Muttering a pained "oomf," the flea knew he'd lost Sesshomaru when he heard the door slide open and then close again.

The inu-youkai in question walked purposefully through the halls of his castle until he reached the front doors, where two boar-youkai stood on guard. He turned to the one on the left and held out the scroll he'd been carrying.

"Take this immediately to the southern tai-youkai. Be as quick as you can."

The lesser demon bowed swiftly, eager to please his lord. Not a second later, he was off, message in hand.

**OooOooOooOooO**

To say that Daisuke had been happy to hear from Sesshomaru would have been an understatement. Indeed, the water-youkai had been beside himself with joy. He all but skipped through his home, announcing in a sing-song voice, "He wants to meet her!"

His daughter, Minami, was more controlled in her excitement. She was glad, of course, that Sesshomaru wanted to give her a chance, but her dignity kept her from prancing about like her father.

One week after receiving word from the inu-youkai of the west, Daisuke and Minami, along with a small train of vassals, set out on a journey to Sesshomaru's castle, where he had so graciously invited them for their meeting. Upon arriving at the place they were promptly greeted by several of the lord's servants. One, an ancient dog demon named Ren who had been in the service of Sesshomaru's family for more years than she could count, led them to the dining hall, where a huge feast was already being laid out. The Lord of the West, himself, was there to welcome them.

"Good afternoon, Lord Daisuke, Lady Minami."

"Ah, and similar pleasantries to yourself, my lord!" Daisuke exclaimed jubilantly. "What a truly blissful conference this is!"

There was a slight downward quirk in the corner of Sesshomaru's lips. "Quite. Please, sit down."

His guests did as was asked of them, depositing themselves on the cushions across the table from their host. Covering the table between them was a wide array of expertly prepared dishes, proof of the inu-youkai's wealth and power, and once he motioned for them to dig in, neither water-youkai wasted their time in doing so. Daisuke's plate was piled high with food in minutes. Minami, the lady, selected a significantly smaller amount. Sesshomaru, it appeared, wasn't eating, for he made no move to grab anything from the selection.

"Now, leth's get s'raight to business, Sessoma'oo," said the southern tai-youkai through a mouthful of cooked fish. "I fink a mating be'ween my daw'er an' yourself would be benefifull to the boff of us," he swallowed. "I mean, such an alliance would make us stronger, not to mention the positive change in trade we could have!"

"Yes, of course," Sesshomaru assented, deciding to ignore the rudeness of the other youkai. "But my reasons for seeking a mate at this time are not for power or money. I need a suitable heir, that is all."

"If that's the case, you need not worry, my friend! Minami is of the highest breed, and she will not disappoint, isn't that right, my dear?" Daisuke looked at her expectantly.

She nodded. "Yes, Father."

"Stand, my lady," ordered Sesshomaru.

Not one to ignore a demand from such a man, Minami did as she was told, standing tall with her shoulders squared and her hands clasped before her. She kept her gaze averted down, a show of respect to the inu-youkai as he stood after her.

She was, without a doubt, quite beautiful. Sporting waist length, smooth black hair that was currently pulled into one of the latest fashions, pale blue eyes, and an elegant posture, Minami possessed a quiet reverence that bespoke honor and obedience. She was neither too thin nor too heavy, and beneath the rich kimono she wore, Sesshomaru could make out a pleasing figure. She did not appear weak, by any means, and so his decision was an easy one. She would easily be able to meet his needs.

"You will do."

**OooOooOooOooO**

_AN: Research is a great thing, isn't it? For anyone who cares to know, when Lord Daisuke was talking with his mouth full, I wasn't sure how what he was saying would sound, so I grabbed a bowl of cereal and decided to try saying his line with my own mouth full! Talk about writing from experience._

_Hanyou: half-demon_

_Miko: Shinto priestess_

_Youkai: demon (roughly translated, that is)_

_Tai-youkai: I suppose that this would be the equivalent to "demon lord"_

_Mokomoko-sama: this is the fluffy boa-ish thing that Sesshomaru wears over his shoulder, and it was named this by Rumiko Takahashi, herself. _

_Inu: dog_

_Haori: the upper half of Inuyasha's outfit… traditional Japanese clothing_

_Hime: princess_

_Kanji: one form of Japanese writing_

**Disclaimer: **_**Inuyasha**_ **is property of one Ms. Rumiko Takahashi. And thank gosh for that, because if I owned it you would be running for your life. Toodles.**


	4. Three: Kotaromaru

**-Chapter Three-**

**-Kotaromaru-**

"_His wife smiled in her sleep. Why?_

_She's immortal. She has a son."_

_-Ray Bradbury_

**------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------**

_And so that is how my mother came into the picture. I don't think I need to tell you that my father was never in love with her. He needed her to give him me, but that was all. That's not to say that he was cruel to her or any sort of thing. For the time that he was with her, she was treated with respect and hospitality. But he never felt any kind of romantic feelings for her whatsoever. Then again, he didn't really give himself the chance to._

_You see, after I was born and my safety was ensured, my father disappeared forever. It is possible that he is still alive, but highly unlikely, as I suspect that he would have wished to follow Kagura in death as soon as he could. I can only hope that somewhere in the next world, the two of them are finally together._

_You may ask, aren't you angry with or bitter towards your father for leaving your mother and you alone? The answer would be no. For if I was in his predicament, I'd do the same thing. My mother was strong, anyway. She, as well, had no emotional attachment to my father, so his departure didn't trouble her greatly. She did a fine job raising me… For the time that she could, which was until I was eleven. That, however, is a chapter of this story to be told a little later._

**OooOooOooOooO**

Sesshomaru, educated youkai that he so obviously was, did not fail to notice the tired cliché that was a heavy thunderstorm tearing through the dark sky on the night his son and heir was born. Inside Minami's room, the water-youkai struggled through the pains of labor. His child was bound to be a rather big infant; Sesshomaru himself had been. His sharp ears heard the woman scream and moan through the thin paper screen and the silky curtain of his silver hair.

Mentally he tallied up the number of hours he had so far spent waiting outside her quarters. Four. Average, for a youkai birth. Two times a lady in waiting had stuck her head into the hallway to inform him of the progress - both times he merely grunted and waved her away. Every so often, one of his personal advisors would visit him, asking why he wasted his time just waiting when he could be using the spent time to finalize deals or plot wars. It was uncommon for a man like himself - so important - to appear as though he cared about the outcome of the whole birthing process. Sesshomaru's own father had not even been home when his mother, Rei, had brought him into the world. With a slightly annoyed twitch of his left brow, he remembered how the Inu no Taisho had raced away at top speed to witness the birth of his half-breed embarrassment of a brother, however.

In any case, Sesshomaru just dismissed all his nosy advisors, too. The truth was that the tai-youkai _was_ a tiny bit worried about Minami and his son. Although, the reason was completely selfish. He needed them both to be well and alive at the end of it all, so he could just… disappear. His plans were all laid out: he would name his heir, bid farewell to Minami, deliver one last letter, and then no one would ever see him again. He would follow the path that everyone who was important to him had taken. His mother, his father, Kagura, Rin, and even… Jaken.

It truly was the perfect plan; everyone would be happy with the outcome. His advisors would absolutely bask in the glory of being able to raise and mold the new tai-youkai. Inuyasha and the company he kept would undoubtedly be glad to be free of Sesshomaru, despite the hanyou being denied the chance to "settle the score", as he put it, but he would get over that. And Sesshomaru himself would finally, _finally_ be free. Free of his responsibilities and his troubles. Free of the burden of thought, emotion, living.

"My Lord," a high-pitched voice interrupted his musings. With a small, unseen jolt as he returned to his senses, the inu-youkai realized that the sounds of Minami's labor had died. It was quiet. The beginnings of anxiety unfurled in his gut - such a familiar sensation now. Wasn't there supposed to be crying? Why couldn't he hear a baby?

"My Lord," the female servant repeated, addressing him with her head once again sticking out from the doorway to his mate's rooms. "You may enter now."

Sesshomaru stood up seamlessly, unfolding himself like a sheet of cloth, fluidly, and strode past the girl without a word. The atmosphere in Minami's quarters was heavy and humid, and it was impossible to miss that something of great importance had just taken place.

_My son,_ thought Sesshomaru, _my heir. Mine._

Beside the far wall, sweaty and red and ruffled, was an exhausted Minami. But the tai-youkai's molten eyes overlooked her appearance and focused instead on the tightly wrapped bundle in her arms, roughly the length of his forearm and approximately four times as wide. Minami said nothing, merely offered him the bundle with a tired but proud look in her gaze.

Taking it - _mine, my child - _from her, balancing it in his lone right arm, he tilted his head down and met with one of the strongest waves of emotion he had ever experienced. The fierce shock, awe, _pride_ was nearly enough to make him visibly stagger. It was like looking at his own smaller, much younger reflection, with obvious flaws.

The baby in his hold was comprised of the same pale, faultless beauty that Sesshomaru possessed. Its tiny eyes were open and they shone just as brightly golden as his own as they stared up at him in infantile wonder. Just peeking out of the top of the blanket was a shock of smooth white hair. The shape of its face was so familiar, and yet there was no crescent moon upon the child's forehead, no markings on its eyelids. Sky blue stripes - one on each cheek - were the only perceivable crests. But then a tiny, claw-tipped hand shot out of the swaddling folds and wrapped itself securely around a strand of Sesshomaru's long silver mane that had fallen forward during his perusal of this wondrous new creature. The hand tugged twice, insistent, and the tai-youkai realized with another surge of pride that the reason he had heard no crying earlier was because this was _his son_ and he was strong, just as strong as his father and grandfather before him. He would make an excellent ruler.

Sesshomaru lifted his head and looked at Minami, who was smiling fondly at him and the child. He felt a rush of gratitude towards her for bringing this miracle into the world for him, but didn't know what or how to express the feeling. But she just shook her head, seeming to understand and say, _you're welcome, _and, _I'll take care of him when you're gone._

Because she knew; of course she knew. The woman was smart and after only several months of living in her mate's presence, understood that he had never planned on sticking around with her. And she accepted it. Sesshomaru thought that perhaps, under some other circumstances, he might have learned to care for her as someone more intimate.

"What will you call him, My Lord?" she asked softly.

Speaking past the inexplicable lump in his throat, he answered, "Kotaromaru."

**OooOooOooOooO**

_And there you have it. Unlike most children, I loved to hear the story of my birth. Craved it, even. It was my customary bedtime story, so important to my daily happiness that before my mother died she ensured that there would always be someone around to tell it to me before I went to sleep at night. Why was it so vital? The answer is simple: it was the only memory I had of interacting with my father. After that evening I never saw him again. Mother told me that he lingered long enough to announce my existence to the castle before he left. In the commotion that followed his declaration, he slipped away into the cover of the storm and that was that._

_True to her unspoken word, my mother took excellent care of me once Father had disappeared. My earliest recollections are of her smiling face while she played with my hair or wiped smudges off my face…_

**OooOooOooOooO**

Minami laughed softly, the sound like the tinkling of a small bell, ringing in the pointed ears of the young tai-youkai.

"S'not funny, Mother," Kotaromaru huffed, resorting to the use of her formal title in order to display his displeasure with her amusement.

But the woman just laughed again, much to the annoyance of her four year old son. "Don't be such a sour puss," she told him, extending one long, thin finger to poke the tip of his nose. Minami couldn't help teasing the boy - his disgruntled scowl was adorable, but it was the imperious, holier-than-thou expression that he had given when the butterfly had first landed on his head that _really_ tickled her funny bone. In that moment there had been no mistaking whose son he truly was; he had looked exactly like Sesshomaru, even if he didn't realize it.

At such a young age it was remarkable how many times a day Kotaromaru managed to remind Minami of his father. The resemblance was there in the way he commanded the errant insect to immediately disengage itself from his person, and his instant scramble to smooth down his already flawless locks after the creature had fluttered away into the spring breeze. Of course, Sesshomaru would not have bothered to appear as though he was concerned with his hairdo, but that was only because he would have the confidence to know that his hair was immaculate anyway. Minami suspected that as he grew older, her son would develop the same self assurance.

But then, in many other ways, the boy was very different from his sire, and she figured that was just as well. She did not want her son to follow a path that was identical to Sesshomaru's, because she knew there were parts of the inu-youkai's life that had resulted in a lasting negative impact upon the lord, whether or not he ever admitted it. Most significantly, Minami wished to avoid the family conflict: the full measure of that which Sesshomaru went through was made painfully clear to her when his half brother came pounding on her door two days after Kotaromaru was born.

_The infant pup in her arms wiggled and crooned, already so energetic, grasping at the long black waves of her hair dangling before his face. She was getting ready to feed the child when suddenly there was a huge crashing sound and moments later, looking very harassed, one of her lady servants came rushing into the room._

"_My Lady," she gasped, eyes darting back and forth to the entrance as though she expected someone to come tearing through it, "You have… a visitor."_

_And before Minami could move to protest or demand an explanation, the door slid open forcefully, revealing the source of all the noise. In its frame stood a man - hanyou, she recognized, noting the furry little dog ears on his head - who bore a striking similarity to her departed mate. She quickly realized, however, that this person was nothing like Sesshomaru at all. _

"_Where the hell is he?"_

_One of her sculpted black brows rose. "Excuse me?"_

"_I said where the hell is he, bitch?"_

_Minami was not accustomed to being spoken to in such a demeaning manor, and she almost motioned for the guards who were waiting anxiously behind the hanyou to seize him, but something in his rugged appearance just barely stopped her. Was that worry?_

"_First of all, half-breed," she said, sounding fierce, "You will address me with the proper respect. I am the Lady of this land, understood?"_

_The man looked like he was going to tell her to stick her propriety somewhere it didn't belong, but she cut him off and continued, "Second of all, the term 'he' is incredibly vague and could apply to any number of beings, including yourself. So before you open your mouth again, do think about elaborating, would you?"_

_To his credit, the hanyou actually looked like he was trying to control his obviously rising temper. When he started talking again, it was in a strained but softer voice. "I'm looking for that bastard, Sesshomaru. He sent me some crazy fucking letter and I want answers."_

_Minami blinked in surprise. "A letter?"_

_The man nodded. "Yeah. Here."_

_He tossed it to her, and Minami held it out to read in the hand that was not occupied with holding Kotaromaru. It read:_

'_Inuyasha,_

_By the time you have opened this letter I will be too far gone to ever return. In case you don't understand what that means, and I don't doubt that that is the case, I will explain. Read carefully, I won't be coming by to elaborate again. I am leaving, Inuyasha. Permanently. There is nothing left here to tie me down. You will find upon visiting my home, which I am sure you will do, that I am no longer needed there. I have taken a mate and sired an heir, and so I am departing as soon as this scroll reaches its destination._

_Do not come to conclusions, Inuyasha. I am not writing to you with sentimental drivel about how I wish we could have gotten along better or that I regret our hatred of one another - that is not the case. But there is this: my son will grow to be a powerful youkai lord, and perhaps one day he will do the job I did not and end your sorry life. But that is later. Here and now he is young, an infant. I named him only an hour ago. His mother, Minami, is a capable woman, but vulnerable, as there are those who would aspire to cause her and my son harm. If I thought some great advantage could come of my remaining here to protect them myself, I would stay in an instant, but nothing would come of it, because those same enemies have heard tell of my unforgivable moment of weakness as well. _

_I am speaking, of course, of our encounter with Naraku. Words fail to express how much disdain I harbor towards that memory, Inuyasha, but let me tell you that it is significant enough so that I shall cease to discuss it here. _

_Let me make my point - I have been shed in a dishonorable light, and the people who will want to exploit this will not hesitate to act quickly. If they are to attack, it will be soon, while they are sure that they have the upper hand. Undoubtedly, they will have gathered an enormous force to support them, one that I am unlikely to be able to counter when my reputation has been so sullied recently. My former allies will be reluctant to offer their aid. The odds of my winning such a battle are few and far between._

_This is why I am writing to you. I will leave, and when I do, my enemies will perceive a misconception. They will believe I have fled in fear, and left my home unguarded and open to attack. They will let their egos get the better of them, become careless. They will underestimate the power of the protection I have left behind. That protection, Inuyasha… is you. Despicable half-breed though you are, there are many full blooded youkai alive today who have let themselves go and become a disgrace to the noble blood that they are so proud of, and they are worse than you. They are _weaker _than you. _

_When they come calling, I ask you to protect my son. You will have the assistance of any who are still loyal to me, and you will find that those who are will be extremely useful in battle and otherwise. Under my orders, they will obey you._

_Will you do this for me, Inuyasha? It is the only request I leave for you, and I do so reluctantly. But the well-being of the future tai-youkai takes precedence over my pride, and so here we are. Protect him, Inuyasha, if not for myself, then for his own sake. He is your nephew, after all._

_Sesshomaru'_

_Minami's mouth was agape by the time she finished reading the letter. She could scarcely believe that the Sesshomaru she had known could have written such a plea, or confess his own weakness. She reread the last paragraph, and the final sentence jumped out at her. '_He is your nephew, after all._' That meant…_

_She looked up at the man called Inuyasha. "You're his brother."_

_He snorted. "Half-brother. What of it?"_

_Sesshomaru had never mentioned having a half-brother. She thought she knew why. "I'm Minami," she explained, standing up and taking a step towards the hanyou._

_He nodded slightly, like he already knew that, and his amber colored eyes drifted down, towards the bundled up baby who was staring curiously at him. "That's the kid, huh?" Inuyasha asked, ears tilting forward when Kotaromaru gurgled in the back of his throat._

_Minami nodded._

"_What's his name?"_

"_Kotaromaru."_

_Inuyasha nodded again. "Figures he'd name the pup after himself."_

_At that, Minami chuckled, and the hanyou looked taken aback by her reaction. After a moment he blushed lightly and muttered, "Keh."_

_Struck by a sudden impulse, the water-youkai asked, "Would you like to hold him?"_

_Once more, Inuyasha appeared startled, as though the last thing he expected was for her to offer such a thing. He shook his head almost violently, but she could see the interest in his eyes. She took another step forward, making him wary. But when she extended the baby for his perusal, the hanyou lifted a tentative hand towards the bundle._

_Instantly the child's fingers groped at Inuyasha's hand, latching on tightly to his much larger thumb. Inuyasha uttered another soft "keh", and the hint of a smile played around his lips. He looked kindly upon the baby, as Minami was sure he never did toward Sesshomaru. It made her feel happy, for some reason._

_The moment ended soon after, when the hanyou withdrew his hand - Kotaromaru complained loudly - and backed away. His expression was closed and carefully guarded, but Minami thought she heard a bit of wonder in his voice when he promised, "I'll be back tomorrow."_

And he did come back, the next day and every day after that for a week. Minami would sit with him, baby in her arms, and they would talk about all sorts of things. She told him what she knew of Sesshomaru's plan, which wasn't much more than he already guessed, and he told her about himself. He explained a little about his relationship with his brother, and assured her that he would protect her son if and when the time came when it was necessary. He wasn't about to let a member of his family - even his brother's child - die at the hands of those awful greedy youkai. It wasn't Kotaromaru's fault that he belonged to Sesshomaru, anyway.

After that week of discussions, Inuyasha went back to his home, a village that he gave her the directions to, and told Minami to send for him whenever she needed to. Watching him leave, the water-youkai reflected that if there ever came a day when she couldn't be around for her son, she was glad that someone like Inuyasha would be there for him.

As Sesshomaru predicted, the enemies came, and they were sadly unprepared. Expecting nothing more than a desolate castle full of useless servants, a weak youkai hime, and a defenseless pup, they were extremely surprised when their tiny force was destroyed by the small army led by one angry hanyou. The second time the attackers came, Inuyasha had brought along his friends to the fray, and Minami watched from the safety of her rooms while he and his strange assortment of companions fought valiantly for her cause. At his side were a human monk, a youkai slayer, and her pet hellcat. The other two comrades he brought along - a strangely dressed miko girl and a little kitsune - stayed inside with Minami, eagerly watching the fight along with her.

The girl, Kagome, was undoubtedly Inuyasha's mate. Minami liked her. The moment Kotaromaru set his eyes on her, it was clear that he liked her as well. He waved his chubby baby arms at her, his signal to be played with, and Kagome complied happily, not in the least bit put off by his miniature sharp fangs and claws. She seemed used to such features, and Minami guessed that it was from playing with the kit, whom the miko treated as though he were her own son, which was impossible.

When the assailants finally gave up, about three long weeks of constant feuding later, Inuyasha and his group packed up and got ready to leave. When it was time to say farewell, Kotaromaru clung to Inuyasha's haori and was reluctant to let go. Minami finally had to pull him away somewhat forcefully, and the hanyou quickly ruffled the pup's hair to calm his crying.

"Call on us again if you need to," Kagome said, smiling.

"I will," Minami nodded, returning the gesture.

"Keep yourself safe," the monk, Miroku, advised.

Inuyasha made a noise of assent, then turned on his heel and walked away. The others gave small waves and parting motions before following after him.

Now, three years later, Minami had only seen the mismatched assembly a handful of times, the majority of which being on each of her son's birthdays, when Kagome insisted upon visiting and giving the boy a present. The last time they had showed up, Kagome was carrying a newly born baby boy in her arms, and Inuyasha looked incredibly proud of himself.

"Kyuichi," Inuyasha introduced his son, and Minami remembered Kotaromaru remarking how much his new cousin looked like a wrinkled red pig, for which she promptly swatted him over the head for. Inuyasha, on the other hand, had just told his nephew that he had looked the same exact way as a baby, making the young tai-youkai scowl in offense and denial.

Presently, as she watched her son mutter angrily about "stupid butterflies" and "giggling girls", Minami knew she was happy with the way things had turned out so far. It was true, that Kotaromaru was becoming more and more like Sesshomaru every day, but at the same time, she recognized the vein of wildness in the boy, and knew exactly where he had inherited it from.

"Momma," said Kotaromaru, in good spirits again. "What're you so happy about?"

Minami let her warm gaze meet that of her child's as she responded, "I'm just thinking about how much I love you, _aisoku_."

Kotaromaru crossed his arms in front of his chest, blushing faintly, and said, "Keh."

---------------------------------------------------

_Youkai: demon (roughly translated, that is)_

_Inu no Taisho: Sesshomaru's father's title; I don't believe he was ever actually given a real name in the series._

_Tai-youkai: suppose that this would be the equivalent to "demon lord."_

_Hanyou: half-demon_

_Inu: dog_

_Hime: princess_

_Miko: Shinto priestess_

_Kitsune: fox spirit/demon_

_Haori: the top half of Inuyasha's Fire Rat ensemble_

_Aisoku: "beloved son"_

**Disclaimer: **_**Inuyasha**_ **is property of one Ms. Rumiko Takahashi. And thank gosh for that, because if I owned it you would be running for your life. Toodles.**


	5. Four: Ill

**-Chapter Four-**

**-Ill-**

"_And I would have stayed up with you all night,_

_Had I known how to save a life_."

_-The Fray, "How to Save a Life"_

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_My uncle and his friends - which I came to realize were really his unconventional family - did not come by often. They had their own lives to be getting on with. Miroku and Sango were having children every two years or so, and Aunt Kagome was always taking trips to her home in the future (I would learn about that later) so that her mother could interact with her grandchildren. After Kyuichi came Miyami, who in my opinion is a much more suitable cousin than her loud and obnoxious brother. _

_In any case, I was always grateful and excited when they would visit me, most particularly when Aunt Kagome had a gift in hand. At first, I was just happy for the change of company - it was fun to have children my own age around. But as I grew older, the reason for my gratitude shifted. You see, I've come to another part of the story that I find rather hard to tell. Please bear with me, I will do my best. But it's never a comfortable thing, talking about how my mother passed away…_

**OooOooOooOooO**

_Crash._

The blow resounded like thunder in his pointed ears. Kotaromaru's vision swam; he felt his head spinning and didn't know how to stop it. Instinctively he dropped his halberd to clutch at his temples. The weapon, called Danryokusei, nearly as tall as him and almost as wide, clattered heavily onto the ground, and the sound was followed by the deep voice of Nagushoka, the enormous bear youkai whom was the cause of all the pain blossoming throughout the tai-youkai's brain.

"No, no, no! How many times do I have to say it for you to understand? _Never_ lower your sword! You left yourself completely undefended. What's more, how are you going to win in battle if you can't even take a weak hit like that?" Nagushoka trudged forward, stopping a foot away from where the nine year old Kotaromaru was still rubbing his head. Over his shoulder, the giant axe he used as a weapon glinted evilly in the late afternoon sun. "Hmmph," the older youkai grunted, in response to Kotaromaru's pained moan. "How pathetic." He practically spat the last word before turning on his large heel and starting in the opposite direction. "We're finished for today," called Nagushoka over his shoulder. "We'll pick up where we left off when you find some guts."

The inu-youkai child sat on the ground, sniffling miserably, wondering why it was he could never seem to please his trainer when it came to dueling. Oh, sure - he could perform hand-to-hand combat perfectly fine. He was quick, light, and agile, and those things gave him the upper hand against Nagushoka, who was strong but moved sluggishly.

But with a sword in hand… He was nearly useless. He fingered the growing lump on his head gently, since it was still throbbing. It would be gone by tomorrow morning at the latest, he was sure. Even so, it hurt _now._

His lack of skill made no sense to Kotaromaru; every advisor, guard, and servant he met in the castle told him of his father's great prowess with his sword, the Tokijin. All those youkai expected him to become great like Lord Sesshomaru. It was in his blood, they said, as real as the yellow of his irises. What would they think when they discovered he had no talent for such things at all? What would his mother say? Would Minami be disappointed with him, her only son? Would _Uncle_ be disappointed in him?

The thought alone was too much to even consider, so Kotaromaru hauled himself to his feet and strapped the Danryokusei to his back. He took off at a quick jog towards the dojo, hoping that Nagushoka had gone there. But when he arrived the bear was nowhere to be found, and his axe had been stored safely in the weapons shed. Sighing, the tai-youkai realized he would probably have to wait until tomorrow to practice again.

After putting his halberd in its proper place in the shed, he headed back in the direction of the main house, counting on his fingers the number of days until his tenth birthday.

"Thirteen… Twenty-seven… Thirty-three."

Thirty-three days. One cycle of the moon, and a little left over. That wasn't very much time, he worried. But still, if that was all he had, he would make the best of it. In his head he vowed that by the next time his uncle, aunt, and cousins came to visit him, he would be the best swordsman any of them had ever seen.

**OooOooOooOooO**

But his uncle's family never came that day, just over one month later. Instead, as the sun was setting on the tenth celebration of his birth, and right about the time that Kotaromaru was holed up in his bedroom and beginning to think they had forgotten about him, a letter came with his name on it.

The writing was Aunt Kagome's - he could recognize it anywhere - and inside it said:

'_Dear Kotaromaru,_

_I hope this makes it to you on time, sweetie. First of all, happy birthday! Ten is an important number, you know. You're going to be a big man, soon. Everyone here sends all their best wishes to you - Uncle Inuyasha, Kyuichi, Miyami, Shippo, Sango, Miroku, Sachiko, Yoshio, Tsune, and even little Shintaro!_

_Secondly, we're all _so, so _sorry that we couldn't make it to be with you today. We wanted to, so badly, but some things have come up, and your uncle and I have to go visit my mama. She's very, very sick, and we don't know if she'll get better-_

Kotaromaru noticed that here the letters on the paper became blurred, as though someone had dripped water on them.

-_but we really hope she will. Anyway, I hope all your birthday wishes came true, sweetheart. I'll write to you again soon._

_My love, and everyone else's,_

_Aunt Kagome'_

Rolled up inside the letter was a dried flower with a ribbon attached to its stem that said, _Love, Miyami, _and a drawing that looked as though three-year-old Shintaro might have made it. The items weren't much, but they and the sentiments from his aunt were enough to erase all his earlier upset. The only thing still bothering him was the fact that it appeared as though Kagome had been crying when she wrote to him, and Kotaromaru hated to see her sad, although he thought he knew why she might be. If her mother was sick, and unable to be cured… Well, he knew how he would feel if his mother died. Minami was practically his whole world; losing her was simply unthinkable.

As he was trying to identify the type of flower his cousin had sent, a knock on the door interrupted him.

"My Lord?" It was Ujitama, the very, very, _very_ old rat youkai that fancied himself Kotaromaru's chief advisor. Kotaromaru didn't like him very much; he had a croaky, nasally voice that instantly gave his identity away whenever he spoke, and a long, pointy nose that was full of long white hairs, the same color as the rest of the whispy stuff falling about his wrinkled old head. The boy was very loathe to admit the man into his room, but thought of the trouble it would cause later and decided to just get on with it.

"Come in," he called, standing up.

The door slid back and Ujitama stepped inside. Kotaromaru noted that he looked particularly frail this evening, but appearances were deceiving.

"My Lord, did you forget?" the rat youkai asked by way of greeting, waving about his thin, bony hands as he did so. His pale gray eyes held that awful glint in them that Kotaromaru knew to mean he had indeed let something important slip his mind.

Fishing for the right words to say to make it seem otherwise, however, all he could come up with was, "Ahm…"

Ujitama smiled. It was a polite smile that showed just the right amount of yellowed teeth to be appropriate. It meant that Ujitama felt superior and was about to wave it in the young youkai's face. "Did you feel it would be acceptable for you to skip your lessons on your birthday, young Master?" he asked.

'_Oh, no,_' Kotaromaru thought. His lessons. Of course, they had seemed so insignificant next to the dreadful absence of his aunt and uncle on such an important day. But even his mother stressed the necessity of his education, and he knew that no excuse would be passable for Ujitama.

So instead of trying to get out of the inevitable punishment he was sure would come, Kotaromaru bowed his head in apology and said, "I'm sorry, sir."

That irritating smile just widened. But the rat youkai's voice was stern and condescending when he replied, "'Sorry' will not get your lines done, will it? Fetch your things now and we shall have the lesson here."

Kotaromaru did as he was asked, all the while cursing the old advisor - Ujitama would never have dared order him around were Minami present, nor would the tai-youkai have allowed such demeaning treatment of himself if it wasn't for the fact that he and Ujitama were alone. The rat was well known for possessing and carrying several extremely deadly poisons around in his flowing robes. It was rumored that he had killed more than one insolent brat in his extensive lifetime. Sly and clever as he was, Ujitama could probably poison Kotaromaru and make it look like an unfortunate accident.

Kotaromaru _really_ didn't like him at all.

"Now," the older youkai said when his student was seated at the low table with his paper, pen, and ink pot. "Since we finished our discussion of Tomisho the Great yesterday, we're going to begin this evening with the miko Midoriko, all right?"

Kotaromaru nodded and started jotting down notes - Midoriko… Hadn't he heard that name somewhere before?

Ujitama began to speak soon, however, and the inu-youkai stopped trying to recall where he knew the miko from lest he miss any of his advisor's information; the old man would not stop to let Kotaromaru catch up or repeat anything if he fell behind.

"Midoriko, as I've already mentioned, was a human miko. And she is only important because she has a very close relationship with our next topic - the Shikon no Tama.

"The miko was the strongest of her age, said to be capable of purifying ten youkai at once with ease. She possessed in great quantities the four souls, which are, when united, supposed to be extremely powerful. The four souls are: aramitama, nigimitama, kushimitama, and sakimitama. Courage, friendship, wisdom, love.

"There was another human, a man, with a filthy and impure soul, who desired the miko. When she shunned his affections, however, his anger and longing for revenge created a hoard of lesser youkai who attacked Midoriko. The battle raged for a quarter cycle before the woman realized she could not carry on much longer, especially since the youkai merged to form one enormous beast.

"With all her remaining powers, Midoriko sealed herself and the youkai within the Shikon no Tama, which burst forth from her chest once formed."

Ujitama looked appraisingly over Kotaromaru's shoulder to see if the boy had written down everything, which he had. "Do you have any questions, then?" he asked of the young tai-youkai.

Kotaromaru shook his head; he now remembered who had mentioned Midoriko to him before. His Aunt Kagome had named the dead miko when he had asked her what it was that hung on the necklace around her neck. It was none other than the Shikon no Tama, recently purified and powerless. Kagome had explained to him that a wish had been made on the jewel, thus rendering it nothing but a pretty trinket, but would not say where she got it or how. "You're too young," she informed him, making him pout.

"Very well," Ujitama responded. "Then let's-"

But before he could complete his sentence, there was an urgent knock from outside the room and a second later the door slid open without even giving Kotaromaru a chance to utter a sound. In the doorway stood a panting, anxious looking sentinel who was usually responsible for guarding the library.

"What do you think you're doing?" Ujitama snapped, his light eyes gleaming.

"My apologies, m'lord," the guard said very fast, but he wasn't looking at the advisor; his sight rested on Kotaromaru. "It's the Mistress, m'lord. She's not well."

The tai-youkai didn't wait for anything more to be said. He stood quickly and started towards the exit, but a firm grip suddenly engulfed his upper arm and stopped him in his tracks. Ujitama had surprisingly strong hands.

"You are not going anywhere, child. Sit down."

Kotaromaru glared, unafraid of the youkai with the thought of Minami, hurt, in his mind. "Let go. I am going to see my mother."

"You are not leaving this room until our lesson is finished," the rat sneered, his foul teeth showing.

In the entrance, the guard stood helplessly, unsure if he should interfere. He decided not.

Feeling brave and grown-up, Kotaromaru drew himself proudly up to his full height - four and a half feet - and snarled, "_I_ am the lord of this land, and _you_ will not tell me where and when I can go."

And Ujitama, so shocked by the imperial tone of the boy's voice, actually loosened his grip, from which Kotaromaru wrenched his arm before hurrying off to find his mother.

**OooOooOooOooO**

By the time he reached her, Minami had been moved from the library, where she reportedly collapsed, to her quarters. She was tucked into bed and still had not woken up.

Kotaromaru asked everyone to leave her rooms when he arrived, and sat by her side alone, replacing the cold cloth on her forehead every hour with a new one as instructed by the maids who were tending to her before. He spoke not a word, unsure of what he could possibly tell an unconscious woman that would help at all.

When the half moon rose and the crickets began their chirping outside the castle, and still Minami had failed to come out of her slumber, he grew inherently worried. What could be wrong with her? Was she simply exhausted? He couldn't recall anything that would make her so. Perhaps the heat of the summer evening had gotten to her; he knew she sometimes complained that the humidity made her dizzy. He certainly hoped that was the only problem-

A hoarse groan, barely audible, issued from his mother's throat. If Kotaromaru hadn't been blessed with a superhuman sense of hearing, he was sure he would have missed it. As it was, the hair on the back of his neck stood up in anticipation, and waited, hoped, prayed, _'Let her be okay… Please, Mama, be okay.'_

But no more sounds came from Minami, who slept on, looking peaceful, while her son cried quietly long after the crickets outside had fallen silent.

**OooOooOooOooO**

When the lady of the castle finally opened her eyes the next afternoon, it was immediately apparent that she was no longer the woman who had been happily singing while she wove her way through the library the night before, searching for a book to read to Kotaromaru.

True enough, outwardly she did not appear to have changed much, although her skin was slightly less rosy than was customary. That, however, was a temporary side effect of her collapsing, and was expected to vanish properly in no time at all. No, it was the very small, subtle altercations in her demeanor itself that clued the young tai-youkai into the shift that had taken place.

When she thought he wasn't looking, Minami would gaze upon Kotaromaru with a heartbreaking expression of melancholy. He deemed it something akin to the look one might wear if they grieved over the inevitable loss of something or someone they loved very much. But why would his mother appear so? If anyone was to be in distress, it should have been Kotaromaru, who had mulled around the terrifying idea throughout the night that she might never wake up again.

Aside from the occasional strange glances, though, nothing seemed out of sorts. Kotaromaru hoped that the episode had been a one time occurrence, for both his sake _and_ Minami's. He wasn't sure he could take another scare like the one her bout had given him. His heart would probably burst under the strain.

But two weeks passed without activity, good or bad. Kotaromaru was just in the process of heaving a sigh of relief when another letter came from Kagome. This one was much less cheerful than the last. Tear stains so large covered all parts of the letter so that it made it hard for the tai-youkai to really make out the words. Some looked like they had symbols missing altogether. The beginning of the note was written shakily, adding to the discord.

Minami, who was resting on a mat next to him, asked, "What does it say, _aisoku?_"

He read aloud:

"'Kotaromaru,

I'm sorry to say that it may be a while before we get to visit you again, sweetie. Your uncle and I went to visit my mama, like I said we would. She's not doing well. All the best doctors I could find are trying their hardest to help, but sometimes what we need are miracles, and those just can't be paid for.

I'm sorry this is so sloppy, baby. I haven't been myself lately. I'm trying to be strong, you know? It's a little easier with your Uncle Inuyasha here to help me, but still… I'm afraid. I don't want to lose my mama, just like you wouldn't want to lose yours, I'm sure. How is she, by the way? Send my love to her as well, please.

Well, sweetheart, I probably should be going now. Some more doctors are here to see Mama, and I have to talk to them. Let's hope for the best, okay? I'll write again when I have something definite to tell you. I love you very much, baby. Everyone here does.

Hugs and kisses,

Aunt Kagome and the family'."

By the time he had reached the last word, tears had welled up in Kotaromaru's eyes without his even realizing it. Not until Minami pulled him into a warm embrace and the salty droplets fell down his cheeks was he aware of their presence. He wiped them away quickly, but his mother murmured, "It's all right to cry, sweet."

She held him a while longer while the tears steadily but sparsely kept coming. When the last one gathered at his chin, quivered precariously on the edge, and then fell down to be absorbed into his teal silken kimono, she loosened her arms just enough to look at him lovingly.

"Is everything going to be okay, Mama?" he asked softly.

Minami replied with, "Everything will be, my love," and nothing more.

**OooOooOooOooO**

It was perhaps no later than a week following the arrival of the letter from his aunt when Kotaromaru's latest history lesson with Ujitama was interrupted because Minami collapsed to the floor right in the middle of it.

Once more the young inu-youkai found himself in a state of driven panic, where he was able to decide exactly what he wanted to do and why, but could not for the life of him stop his heart from feeling like it might pound a path straight through his chest.

He watched helplessly as Minami was put to bed and tended to. The maids would not grant him sole care of her this time, they felt that a second fainting warranted their control over the situation, and part of Kotaromaru, the part that wanted the best treatment for his mother, agreed heartily.

A constant lookout was kept over Minami, who had grown horribly pale again. The next day rose bright and early, but the lady of the house did not rise with it. Her condition seemed only to worsen over time. Awake but too weak to get up or do much more than whisper whenever she needed something, Minami complained of an awful fever just after the sun broke the horizon. Kotaromaru, who insisted upon helping in some way, no matter how small, was given the task of refilling a bowl with cold water whenever it got too warm so that it could be used to cool the woman down.

The rest of the week was long, trying, and tiresome. Servants were creating a steady two-way flow in and out of Minami's quarters, and the rest of the castle was abuzz with the news that the mistress had yet to show any signs of recovery. Quite the contrary, in fact, when she began coughing up dark red blood one night.

And always Kotaromaru was nearby. Often Minami would request that he sit by her and just keep her company. Sometimes she wished him to speak, others, just his presence was enough. During one such occurrence, despite her son's pleas that she not overexert herself, Minami began to speak back.

"Your fever is going down, Mama," the tai-youkai said. "One of the maids told me so earlier."

Minami smiled weakly. The gesture was painful to see - nothing more than a shadow of her former smiles, so wide and beautiful. So many things about her had diminished in such a short time… Her once silky, shining black hair was dull and lank. Blue eyes that used to dance like the rippling surface of a spring stream had turned bleak. Her cheeks were sunken, her face ashen… Kotaromaru was sure that if he reached out and felt her belly he would be able to feel the contours of her ribs. This woman before him was not the mother he knew. He searched for something happy to say that would remind them both of better times.

"The first thing we're doing when you get better is going outside to catch butterflies, okay? Like we always do. I saw a bunch of them just the other day."

"_Aisoku…_"

Kotaromaru squeezed her hand gently. "Don't, Mama." He could see it was hurting her already raw throat to say even the simplest of words.

"This is it, _aisoku_," she went on, anyway, her voice rasping with every syllable.

Her cryptic sentence was one that he didn't want to know the meaning of. The now familiar stinging behind his eyes made him blink. He didn't want to cry again. "Please, Mama-"

"I am so proud of you… My little boy… So strong, just like your papa…"

Kotaromaru was choking on the lump in his throat, unable to respond. A whine escaped.

"Ssh, my love… You are going to be… just fine…"

Damn those tears that would not let him alone. His eyelids fluttered rapidly, but they only delayed the flood for a short while.

"I love you, _aisoku_," Minami whispered, still smiling with the last of her strength. "Promise you will catch a butterfly for me…?"

The dam broke and Kotaromaru started to sob. He buried his snowy white head in his mama's warm neck, clutching desperately at her shoulders. He could tell she was saying goodbye. He didn't want this to be goodbye. He wasn't ready yet. His head shook from side to side. No.

"Promise me," she said again, stroking his hair. Pushing him away, to be on his own, even as she held him to her heart.

And the Lord of the West, the child, cried harder as he allowed it to happen. "I p-promise!"

**OooOooOooOooO**

Minami left the castle and its occupants the exact same way she had come to them - quietly and without a fuss. She fell asleep five days after speaking to her son and just never woke up.

The entire castle - except perhaps Ujitama - mourned the loss of the kind and great woman who had grown into their lives. None more so than Kotaromaru, who would not come out of his room to talk to anyone for two whole weeks, not even for the burial of his mother.

Eventually, one of the advisors had the sense to write to Inuyasha and inform him of what had happened. The hanyou arrived outside no more than a few days later, alone. He let himself into his nephew's quarters without knocking and found the boy sitting silently at his study table, staring at the bare tabletop.

"What're you doing, pup?"

Kotaromaru did not answer.

"You deaf? I asked you a question."

No response.

Kotaromaru barely had a chance to register the thumps that meant his uncle was approaching him before he was quite suddenly knocked in the side of the head and sent sprawling on the floor. He sprang to his feet, infuriated.

"What was that for?" he screamed.

Inuyasha did not look sorry. He snarled, "You fucking answer me when I'm talking to you, got it?"

"I don't have to listen to you! You're not my father!"

"And you're damn lucky I'm not, 'cause I'd kick your ass so hard you'd feel it for a month!"

This enraged the young tai-youkai even further. "_Get out!_" he screeched, stamping his foot. "Get out, get out, _get out!_" He could not reign in his temper, could not fight the urge to yell himself hoarse at this man who had not been there for him when he needed him most. Could not help squashing the rational voice that said his uncle had no way of possibly knowing that Minami had died.

"_I hate you!_" he continued, enjoying the sting in his throat. "Just _go away!_"

But Inuyasha did none of the things he was ordered to do. In fact, he walked forward, closing the distance between them and grabbed the boy's upper arms in a tight grip. Kotaromaru struggled immediately. As strong as he was, he was no match for Inuyasha, who did not let up at all.

"Let go of me! Let go! Why can't you just leave me al-lone…?" Kotaromaru's voice broke suddenly, and his strength drained out of him as quickly as if someone had pulled some hidden plug. He slumped forward into his uncle's grasp, exhausted. It was a little while before he realized with a jolt that Inuyasha was hugging him tight. He had never hugged him before.

And the embrace felt like it was the only thing still real in Kotaromaru's rapidly deteriorating world. His uncle's arms were solid, protective, safe. He relaxed gratefully into the hold and fell asleep, securing his first dreamless rest in nearly a month.

---------------------------------------------------

_Danryokusei: resilient, flexible, adaptable_

_Youkai: demon (roughly translated, that is)_

_Tai-youkai: suppose that this would be the equivalent to "demon lord."_

_Inu: dog_

_Miko: Shinto priestess_

_Shikon no Tama: the Jewel of Four Souls_

_Aisoku: "beloved son"_

_Hanyou: half-demon_

**Disclaimer: **_**Inuyasha**_ **is property of one Ms. Rumiko Takahashi. And thank gosh for that, because if I owned it you would be running for your life. Toodles.**


	6. Five: Home

**-Chapter Five-**

**-Home-**

"_Don't leave me here alone,_

_You're as close as it gets to home."_

_-Better Than Ezra, "Our Finest Year"_

**------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------**

_Those were the worst days of my life, you know. But they ended in the best way possible: my uncle coming to see me. We could relate, you see. When he was young, Uncle's mother died. He knew what it was like to be without parents, alone and quite unsure of what to do with yourself. I am ashamed of the way I treated him when he arrived, but he assured me later when I woke up that my reaction was normal. You have no idea how glad I was to hear those words. _

"_It's okay, Kotaromaru." I was so grateful. And when Uncle Inuyasha got up to leave, he said the one thing that made me the happiest I could have been; he asked me to go with him, back to Kaede's village, and live with his family. My family. I agreed immediately, but when the advisors confronted us at the castle gate as we were leaving, they refused to stand aside. Despite what happened, they said, the tai-youkai was required to fulfill his duties. That was when Uncle stepped up to them and told them, none too politely, that they could go and… well, fornicate with themselves, for all he cared. "I'm taking my nephew with me," he insisted. _

_Eventually, with a bit more rude persuasion, the advisors agreed to let us leave, on the condition that one of them come with us to keep my education going. And that I make routine visits to the castle to catch up on any matters of importance. It was Hani, my favorite advisor, who volunteered to accompany us. _

_Ten minutes later we three were headed swiftly for my uncle's home - I rode on his back while Hani ran alongside him. Sometime during the journey I fell asleep again - I hadn't _really_ slept in so long - and when I finally woke up night had already settled over the village._

**OooOooOooOooO**

"_Itsuka eien no nemuri ni tsuku hi made,_" Miyami sang quietly while she dabbed a cold cotton cloth on her older cousin's forehead. He'd been sleeping for hours, and Kagome had told her to just make sure that Kotaromaru was comfortable. Inuyasha watched his daughter from the corner of the bedroom, sitting with his arms and legs crossed.

"_Dou ka sono egao ga taema naku aru you ni_…"

Inuyasha let the song wash over him gently. It was one that Kagome used to sing to their pups when they were newborns. It always seemed to calm him just as much as it did the babies. And he needed calming quite badly at the moment, he thought as he looked solemnly at the unconscious Kotaromaru. Inuyasha knew firsthand what it felt like to lose the most important person in his life, to become an orphan, to be alone. When he thought about it, his and his nephew's situations were very similar - neither had really known their fathers, and their mothers had died when they were young.

But luckily for Kotaromaru, Inuyasha was not about to leave the boy to cope with his feelings himself. The tai-youkai _needed_ someone to be there for him - even if he didn't know it yet, and Inuyasha intended to be that person, despite the fact that he really wasn't sure how to go about offering his support. Although he had now spent the past twelve years in the company of one of the most emotional women on earth, the hanyou was still not accustomed to discussing his personal thoughts. He had no reason to - Kagome knew him inside and out, and his pups were beginning to develop the same sense their mother had, of being able to identify his moods based upon his actions. Even when they couldn't decipher his feelings, Kagome did it for them, thank Kami.

But Kotaromaru had not been in Inuyasha's presence enough to understand him, but then again, he wasn't that kind of person anyway. Kotaromaru was very frank, verbal, and blunt. He said what was on his mind without pretense, when he knew it would be wise to. The boy did not care about what others made of his thoughts or statements, or his manners, for that matter. It was a trait he inherited from Sesshomaru, mused Inuyasha. He snorted lightly.

The point was, in order for Kotaromaru to comprehend that his uncle was there for him, Inuyasha would have to be just as obvious as the young tai-youkai, if not more so. The hanyou did not relish the idea of that. He had a bad habit of saying things that were the exact opposite of what he really meant, and that tended to cause problems.

"Are you okay, Inuyasha?"

He looked up, startled, to find that Kagome had entered the hut without his even noticing it. It was a mark of how distracted he was, to be sure. She now stood in front of him, taking in his scowl and clouded eyes, and knew the answer to her question without having to hear it from him.

Inuyasha unfolded his arms and Kagome sat in his lap. He locked her in a close embrace, loving the instant calm that just her nearness could bring him. The miko sighed. For a little while, they just sat there, listening to the familiar beats of each other's heart. Miyami was still singing quietly over her cousin while she brushed his snowy bangs from his face.

"How is she?" Inuyasha asked.

Kagome frowned, her eyes turned glassy. "She was asleep the whole time. They said she can't feel any pain now."

Smelling the salty scent of her tears, Inuyasha tightened his grip around his mate. He hated that he couldn't fix things for her. His gaze lingered on Kotaromaru for a moment and his anger with himself grew. He couldn't fix anyone.

"Don't be upset, Inuyasha," whispered Kagome, kissing his chin. "I'm just glad that she won't have to suffer anymore."

The hanyou grunted, his chagrin somewhat abated, but still strong. Kagome looked at her nephew and understood.

"That's not your fault."

"I was supposed to be there."

"How could you have known?"

"I just should have. It's my responsibility."

Kagome let loose a frustrated noise. "It is not your responsibility to be a mind-reader, Inuyasha. You've done what you can."

"He told me he hated me."

Miyami stopped singing to look at her parents with worried yellow eyes.

"You know he didn't mean it."

The hanyou had nothing to say about that. He just stared moodily at the floor, prominent scowl lines marring his usually smooth forehead. Kagome kissed him again, on the cheek this time. "You're his hero, Inuyasha. I can see it every time he looks at you. Wait and see, when he wakes up, he'll be glad that you're here."

With that, the miko extracted herself from his hold and stood up. "Come on, Miyami," she beckoned to their daughter. The girls exited the hut, leaving Inuyasha with an unconscious inu-youkai and his torrential thoughts.

The moon was well into its course through the sky before Kotaromaru finally stirred. The time alone had given Inuyasha sufficient opportunity to mull over all the things in his head, so he was sure he would be ready when his nephew sat up slowly and looked around. But Kotaromaru's wide golden eyes settled on Inuyasha, distressed, and suddenly the hanyou had no clue as to what he should be saying or doing.

"Uncle?" The boy's voice was small in the humid summer evening.

Inuyasha had to clear his throat twice before he could respond. "Welcome back to the land of the living, pup."

Instantly the hanyou recognized this as _not_ the right thing to say, since shiny tears pooled in Kotaromaru's eyes. Inuyasha got up and crossed the room in three long strides; when he reached Kotaromaru he knelt down so that they were face to face. The tai-youkai looked like he was trying to fight the urge to cry heavily.

"What're you doing?"

"U-ujitama t-told me that m-men don't c-cry."

Ujitama. A spark of recollection flared in Inuyasha's mind. The rat-youkai who had heartily opposed letting him take Kotaromaru. Ugh.

"That bastard don't know a thing. Don't listen to anything he's got to say, okay?"

Kotaromaru nodded, looking calmer. He sniffed loudly. "This is where you l-live?" he asked after a moment.

Relieved that the boy appeared to be forgetting his sorrow in light of discovering a new place, Inuyasha made a noise of assent. "You want to see the rest of it?"

His nephew's gaze lit up like a torch. "Yes!"

So Inuyasha led Kotaromaru around Kaede's village, pointing out the different places, naming the people they saw. When they reached the last hut and Kotaromaru had yet to see any familiar faces, he inquired, "Where is Aunt Kagome?"

Smelling her on the breeze from the forest, Inuyasha headed that way, the boy in his wake. They happened upon not only Kagome, but Shippo, Miyami, Kyuichi, and everyone else as well, under Goshinboku. When they saw him, every face beneath the ancient tree smiled warmly at Kotaromaru. The resultant feeling in his chest was sweet and pleasant, and their smiles became contagious. He donned one as well; it felt like being real again.

Kagome met him several yards from Goshinboku and hugged him tight, whispering, "It's so good to have you here, sweetie."

His cousins - even Kyuichi - bestowed him with happy greetings, as did Miroku and Sango, the latter of which appeared to be nine months pregnant and then some. The monk introduced their children, whom Kotaromaru had never met. The oldest, twins, Sachiko and Yoshio, shook his hand, and he liked them instantly. Tsune and young Shintaro came next, and each boy grinned at Kotaromaru as if he was some long lost friend of theirs.

"_This is home," _Inuyasha had said, and the tai-youkai found himself inclined to agree. His eyes shifted from one person to another, taking in their kind, welcoming faces, each one filling him with a sense of belonging he had not felt once in his entire life. '_Home,_' he thought. '_I'm home._'

**OooOooOooOooO**

_It might have been pure coincidence, though I could never be sure, but after I turned ten I could never finish a lesson without being interrupted. My advisors all complained over my lack of what they called a proper education, but Uncle just scoffed at them. "He's getting his education," he used to say. "It's just got holes in it, is all."_

_My reason for telling you this is that during my very first lesson with Hani in Kaede's village, a distraction came in the form of little Senko, Sango and Miroku's fifth and final child. I submit to you now that there is nothing quite as effective as keeping a man abstinent as hearing a woman go through labor on a positively scorching afternoon. Or rather, hearing her scream obscenities at her poor husband while he sits by watching._

**OooOooOooOooO**

"So tell me what you remember of the Great Wars, my lord," ordered Hani, sitting opposite Kotaromaru with a patient expression on his face. They were conversing in the same hut that the young inu-youkai had awoken in his first night in the village.

Kotaromaru, hating to disappoint his favorite, and youngest, advisor, dug around eagerly in his brain for all the information he could. But the heat of the day was so intense that it was even able to hinder his thoughts for a second or two, despite the fact that being youkai normally helped protect him from fluctuating temperatures. Dates and titles of important generals flashed around just out of the reach of his grasping memory. Seeing his expression, deep in concentration, Hani chuckled and took pity on the boy. Being an owl youkai himself, he preferred the cooler nights as opposed to the taxing days.

"Never mind, my lord. Why don't we try an easier subject? Something more recent, hm?"

Kotaromaru was eternally grateful for this small kindness. He reflected briefly on how much more enjoyable his lessons were with Hani than they had been with cruel Ujitama, who would have merely berated him for submitting to the heat.

"Like what?"

"What did Ujitama-san tell you of the Shikon no Tama?"

Frowning, Kotaromaru replied, "Not much, Hani. We were just starting the subject when…" He trailed off, not eager to finish the statement, but his advisor understood.

"Ah. Well then, you inform me of what you already know, and I'll finish the lesson for him."

Nodding, Kotaromaru began. "The Shikon no Tama was created during a battle between a great youkai and the priestess Midoriko. Both of their souls were trapped inside when the jewel burst from her chest."

He almost felt that his knowledge seemed rather insubstantial, and apparently Hani felt the same way because he looked mildly exasperated when the tai-youkai finished.

"Is that all?"

The boy nodded again.

"Very well. I see that Ujitama-san was not very thorough at all, was he? I shall have to make up for his lack."

Secretly this scolding of the old rat youkai pleased Kotaromaru to no end, but he didn't let Hani know that. Instead, he just voiced his agreement.

"The Shikon no Tama - make sure you're writing this down, my lord - the Shikon no Tama, because it contained both the miko and the beast she fought, was a source of great power. The spirits of the opposing sides continued their brawl within its confines without pause, and this allowed the jewel to possess a shifting spirituality of its own, so to speak. When it was in the hands of someone pure of heart, the Shikon no Tama could be used for good. Conversely, under the influence of an ill will, it could be tainted with evil.

"To anyone, good or bad, who held the jewel, it was highly valuable, capable of granting one wish without limitations. After granting a wish, however, the Shikon no Tama would be rendered useless."

Kotaromaru was copying everything Hani said very quickly, the ink he used sometimes blotting across the scroll in his haste to not miss a single detail. Hani smiled at this. "Very good," he commented on his pupil's eagerness.

"Now, after its creation, the jewel changed hands many times, as it was sought out rather actively by numerous humans and youkai alike. Eventually it fell into the care of a village of taiji-ya. Slayers, my lord. The elder of their village entrusted the Shikon no Tama's safety to a powerful miko called Kikyo, a woman who lived in this very place here.

"But Kikyo fell victim to a vengeful hanyou named Naraku, who tricked her and the hanyou she was in love with into thinking they had betrayed one another. Naraku wished to taint the jewel with their hatred and bitterness, but he failed. Kikyo pinned her hanyou to the Goshinboku - yes, that tree - just before she died of wounds inflicted upon her during the conflict. The Shikon no Tama was burned with her.

"Quite to the surprise of the world, however, the jewel resurfaced fifty years later. It was then accidentally shattered into dozens of shards that were expelled all across the country. Youkai and humans everywhere found these shards and used them for all kinds of purposes-"

Miyami burst into the hut, curiously ruffled looking with flushed cheeks and erratic breath. She appeared as though she had some great announcement to make, but when she saw Hani her face fell and instantly an air of embarrassment replaced the excitement.

The owl youkai, however, smiled kindly at her. "Yes, Miss Miyami?"

"Um," she gasped, her breathing still coming in fast waves. "Um. It's Sango, sir. She's in labor, and, um, I was wondering, sir, if Kotaromaru wanted to come, um… Wait with us." The young hanyou looked very flustered, and Kotaromaru could no longer tell if she was blushing from running to the hut or from mortification.

Hani, still smiling pleasantly, turned to the tai-youkai. "Well, my lord?"

Kotaromaru blinked stupidly. "Well, what?"

Amusement flashed in the older youkai's orange eyes. "Do you wish to wait with the others?"

"You mean you're going to let me?" Kotaromaru asked, quite amazed. Freedom from his lessons, granted by his teacher, was a new thing.

Nodding, Hani said, "For something important like this, I will allow it."

His face broke into a huge grin, for in actuality the inu-youkai was very eager to meet the newest member of Miroku and Sango's family - _his family_ - and did not want to miss it when the child was born. He stood up, thanked Hani, and ran out next to his younger cousin. They didn't have far to go; their destination was just across the road. It seemed like half the village was outside the hut of the monk and the taiji-ya. Kotaromaru recognized the pottery maker, all three of the old biddies who liked to sit around the village drinking sake, his uncle's neighbors - a young couple, and the kind fisherman who gave Kotaromaru and the rest of the children sweets when they passed by his home. The rest of the people he didn't know, or could only recall by face but not name.

Inuyasha, Shippo, Kyuichi, Sachiko, Yoshio, Tsune, and Shintaro were huddled right outside the doorway. Kotaromaru and Miyami joined them.

"I just can't wait!" cried Sachiko, biting her bottom lip in anticipation. "I hope it's a girl!"

Kotaromaru smiled at her, understanding why she would want a sister. She was, after all, the only female among four children. Despite that, she always got along well with her brothers, playing all the same games and never being afraid to get a little dirty, like the boys were so fond of doing. Kotaromaru liked Sachiko and her twin brother a lot. They were only one year younger than he, which always made them good company. And Yoshio, especially, was much better to be around than Kyuichi, who wanted to do nothing but spar when he was around Kotaromaru. The tai-youkai always refused him, saying he was too tired, hungry, hot, or whatever else he could think of. Honestly he was just afraid that Kyuichi would want to sword fight. If his cousin or his uncle ever found out he still couldn't wield a weapon skillfully, Kotaromaru would be humiliated.

"I hope it's another boy!" asserted Tsune. "We'll show him how to play samurai, won't we, Kyuichi?"

The other boy smirked. "Hell yes!"

His exclamation was immediately followed by a gasp, a thump, a cry of pain, and a bout of giggling. Both Miyami and Sachiko had been taken aback by Kyuichi's obscenity, causing them to each suck in their breath quickly. Inuyasha, the only person who had remained utterly still and silent for the duration of their wait, suddenly regained his mobility to knock his son over the head, much like he had done to Kotaromaru only a few days ago. The younger hanyou let loose a yell, and Kotaromaru sympathized a little, knowing how unpleasant such a blow could be, but that didn't stop him from laughing hard with everyone else.

"Watch your mouth, pup, or I'll wash it out for you," Inuyasha warned.

Kyuichi rubbed his head angrily. "How come I get in trouble but you and Shippo say that word all the time?"

Said kitsune grinned wickedly, his blue eyes glittering. "Sorry, kiddo, but you have to be at least this tall to say bad words." He demonstrated by holding his hand about a foot and a half above the boy's head. "Oops! Looks like you're too short! Sorry, try again next time."

The next second Kyuichi was pouncing on Shippo, trying to punch his chest wildly, but the youkai just laughed and held him back. Eleven years had been kind to the kit, and he was no longer the small child he had been when Kotaromaru first met him. Rather, he had grown lean, muscled, and taller than Inuyasha. Kyuichi stood no chance against Shippo's much longer arms and stronger grip. But still Kyuichi fought valiantly - or was it stubbornly? Probably the latter. - refusing to give up until Inuyasha grunted, "Settle down," and instantly they did.

Kotaromaru continued to chuckle lightly at the disgruntled look on his cousin's face. Miyami, too, apparently thought the whole situation was funny.

"Wow, big brother, you lost pretty bad, huh?" she teased, her mischievous smile showing off the dimples on either side of her face.

"Shut up, Miyami."

"Oi, be nice to your sister!"

"That's right. You gotta be nice to me!"

"Miyami-"

"Sorry, Papa."

Next to Kotaromaru, Yoshio was rolling his eyes. Little Shintaro had crawled into his brother's lap at some point and was now attempting to replicate the maneuver, with some difficulty. His eyes kept crossing oddly, making him shake his head in dizziness. Kotaromaru smiled before turning his gaze to look at the hut. He regretted this instantly, since the movement caused the sun to shine brightly in his vision. It was low over the trees now, casting long shadows and signaling the end of the afternoon. The temperature was dropping too, thankfully.

The sun continued to sink slowly beneath the horizon, and outside the village was still waiting. Not much noise came from inside the hut; "It's still early yet," Shippo assured the children when they worried over this fact. He had sat through all of their births so far, and knew just how long the process could take.

But when the moon was high in the sky, and every one of the younger ones except Kotaromaru had fallen asleep, Sango's pained moans and screams began to carry out into the air. The young tai-youkai's eyes widened upon hearing one particularly strained sounding exclamation.

"Is she going to be okay?" he asked his uncle, who still stood, unmoving, against the hut wall.

"She'll be fine. Sango is tough."

Kotaromaru was doubtful. "It sounds like she's in a lot of pain."

Inuyasha snorted. "Of course she is. She's having a pup. But don't worry; women do this all the time."

"They do?" The boy could hardly imagine such an idea.

"How do you think you got here?" asked the hanyou, looking down at his nephew.

"You mean Mama had to do this too?"

"Yeah. And your aunt, and my mother, and every other mother who ever lived."

"Wow."

A grunt of agreement answered him. Then there was a few minutes of relative silence, broken only by Kyuichi's snores and a loud, "I'm going to kill you for this, monk!" from inside the hut.

But Kotaromaru's thoughts were far from quiet. They were crowding his head, making him feel like if they didn't get out soon they would start pouring from his eyes, ears, nose, and mouth. So he asked, "Uncle Inuyasha, is Aunt Kagome's mama going to be all right?" He said it to relieve some of the tension in his mind, but he found that he actually wished to know the answer as well.

Inuyasha sighed heavily, looking off at the moon with a sadness in his eyes that shocked Kotaromaru. For a moment it seemed like no answer would be given, but then the hanyou uttered, "No, pup."

"Is she…" Kotaromaru didn't know if he dared to say the world aloud - it was such an _awful_ word - but he was spared the agony by his uncle, who finished, "Dying?"

The tai-youkai winced, then nodded.

"Yeah."

"Oh," even to his own ears, Kotaromaru's voice sounded small and childish.

"It's okay, Kotaromaru."

"… It is?"

"Yeah."

"But… won't Aunt Kagome miss her mama?"

"Of course she will," replied the hanyou. "But that's just natural."

Kotaromaru wasn't sure he completely understood. "So why is it okay if she… dies?"

Inuyasha looked like he wasn't sure how to say what he wanted to, and Kotaromaru knew that his uncle didn't like to talk a lot, but instead of just shaking his head, like he normally would have done, Inuyasha said slowly, "Because… Mrs. Higurashi doesn't have anything… to hold her back… I mean… She doesn't have any unfinished business."

"Unfinished business?" The inu-youkai didn't want to bother his uncle, but he couldn't help but ask.

"Well, yeah. She raised her family, looked after 'em. And she knew it was coming."

Small golden eyes stared at the older man in disbelief. "She knew she was going to die?"

"I expect. Everyone does, anyway."

Kotaromaru winced, but knew that was the truth. Inuyasha didn't miss the movement - mentally he kicked himself - and added, to comfort the boy, "She made sure that your aunt and your cousins knew how much she cared for 'em, though, and that's important."

In his head Kotaromaru could hear his mother laughing and hugging him, calling him by the pet name she chose that he always used to hate. It didn't seem like such a bad name now.

"Your mom, she was the same way, pup."

Inuyasha's statement brought Kotaromaru back to the present, and he found himself nodding to the words. "I know," he confessed, startled to realize it was the truth. "She loved me a lot, didn't she?"

"Yeah."

The two males fell silent. In the grass the crickets chirped away, oblivious to the conversation taking place above them. The moon continued to shine, and the world went on peacefully. Kotaromaru could not decide if he had expected it to stop or not, but he found he was content with the way it just kept going, even after he had made such an earth-shattering discovery.

"You're lucky for that, pup," said Inuyasha, his gaze so far in the past that it looked as though it could not be retrieved.

"Didn't your mama love you, Uncle Inuyasha?"

The hanyou's ears drooped, but in the darkness a small glint of white flashed, letting Kotaromaru know that his uncle was - amazingly - grinning.

"She did. But that's what killed her."

The tai-youkai frowned in distress. "What do you mean?"

His uncle sighed again, more heavily than before. "There's a lotta people - and youkai - out there who don't think their races should mix. My mother's people, they made her an outsider for having me, for refusing to just dump me in the forest somewhere or drown me in a river. She used to stand up for me when the villagers would hurt or scare me…"

Kotaromaru found it hard to believe that the man he knew as Inuyasha could ever be scared of anything, but did not say that.

"… And she never said it, but she missed be accepted. Being part of society, ya know? That, and all her sadness for me, it killed her. Inside first, and then outside later."

He ended with such a note of regret that Kotaromaru could not stop the anguished whine that welled up in his throat. It was so difficult for him to imagine that his strong, proud uncle had once been anything but. Or that anyone would want to drown a baby for just being a hanyou. The child didn't choose its own fate! It was unfair that Inuyasha and his mother should have to suffer for something so inconsequential. Quite unexpectedly Kotaromaru's sorrow morphed into anger, a hatred so deep for the ones who had caused Inuyasha pain that he wanted nothing more than to hunt them down and make them pay dearly for it. He started growling aloud, unbeknownst to himself.

Inuyasha almost laughed - _almost_ - at the fierce expression on his nephew's face. It promised vengeance and all sorts of hell, but the hanyou didn't want the boy feeling like that. He put his hand over Kotaromaru's shoulder, just long enough to get his attention.

"Calm down, pup. That's in the past. It don't matter now."

"But your mama-"

"I made up for her a long time ago, pup, when I mated your aunt. I did what my mom would have wanted and lived like I wanted to. That's enough for me."

Kotaromaru was still angry, but he let himself be placated, for the most part, by Inuyasha's words. He thought about what Minami had asked of him - to catch a butterfly - and knew she had really meant that she wanted him to just keep living, and not dwell on the past. It sounded hard, but he thought, for her, he would do it. He'd have done anything to keep her with him, had she just said the word.

"Doing what would have made her happy is what lets me honor her. It's how I let her memory live," Inuyasha said, staring down the stars as if he could his mother in them.

And then Kotaromaru knew that Minami would _always_ be with him, so long as he didn't let her down. The beginnings of a small, warm flame fluttered into existence in his chest. "I'll do that too," he declared, determined to see the promise through to the end.

This time Inuyasha did laugh, just a quiet, quick "heh", but it made Kotaromaru smile. Somehow he could tell his uncle was proud of him for his vow.

"You do that, pup. You do that."

**-----------------------------------------------**

**In case anyone recognized it… The song that Miyami is singing in the beginning is "Dearest" by Hamasaki Ayumi, one of the ending (I think) songs for the **_**Inuyasha**_** series. But you'll have to look up the translation by yourself, because I am way too lazy to find in now. I'll add it sometime soon, I promise. Hah. Anyway, as a precaution, no, I do not own "Dearest" or anything to do with it.**

**Disclaimer: **_**Inuyasha**_ **is property of one Ms. Rumiko Takahashi. And thank gosh for that, because if I owned it you would be running for your life. Toodles.**


	7. Six: Huff and Puff

**AN: To put the time frame into perspective - Senko was born about two weeks after Kotaromaru went to live with Inuyasha. **

**-Chapter Six-**

**-Huff and Puff-**

"_I believe God put us here on earth to accomplish a certain number of things. _

_And right now, I'm so far behind, I can never die."_

_- Bill Watterson, "Calvin and Hobbes"_

_-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------_

_For those with curious minds, allow me to summarize the rest of that night. Senko finally came into the world - much to the relief of both Miroku and Sango - an hour before dawn. He simultaneously disappointed his sister and overjoyed his brothers by turning out as a male. Nonetheless, Sachiko was the first of us all to hold him and coo over his tiny baby body - besides his mother, of course, and Aunt Kagome, who delivered him._

_I finally went to sleep after the sun was already in the sky, and slept right through the afternoon, courtesy of Hani, who believed I deserved a break. When I woke up I found that Kyuichi had bullied mostly everyone, including Shintaro and Miyami, into a rousing game of bandits and samurai, which I declined to join and merely watched instead. It was all good fun until Kyuichi accidentally gave Sachiko a bruise the size of a large stone. That ended the game and my cousin was left trying to defend himself while Yoshio and Tsune beat him mercilessly with their wooden swords and Uncle Inuyasha just stood back and allowed it to happen. Needless to say, I found that for the most part it was turning out to be a good day._

_Around dinner time, however, things swung out of my favor…_

**OooOooOooOooO**

Kotaromaru and the rest of his family were seated comfortably around a table outside, enjoying their first meal with the newest member of the tribe. Baby Senko was not awake to enjoy the gathering, however; he was sleeping soundly in Sango's arms, quite impervious to the noise all around him - the laughter, conversation, and the occasional loud burp from Kyuichi and Tsune's side of the table, followed by giggles and smothered snorts.

Kotaromaru, personally, had never seen such a dinner before in his life. Each person passed around the platters and dishes of food, taking what they wanted and leaving what they didn't. There were about ten different discussions taking place at once, ranging from the serious to just plain silly. Back at the castle, he usually only ate with Minami and perhaps an advisor or two. Even when the entire court got together for big important meals, what happened were quiet, formal affairs where the chatter was rare and low in volume. Food was more commonly dispersed among each attendant, rather than handed down the table. The young tai-youkai knew no one at the castle would have enjoyed the type of dinner he was experiencing now; that thought somehow made him feel even happier.

"Kotaromaru, pass the rice, please?" asked Yoshio on his left. Kotaromaru complied with a grin, right before he found that on his other side Kagome was offering him a bowl of different vegetables, saying, "Here, sweetie."

He accepted the dish, spooning out what he felt he could eat, and put it down. His plate was now full, and Kotaromaru wasted little time in digging in; he was _really_ hungry. But he had only just started making a dent in his fish when Hani appeared at his side. The owl-youkai had rather grudgingly turned down the opportunity to join them for their meal, saying he had other obligations to tend to.

"Hani!" Kotaromaru greeted. "Are you finished with your chores? Can you eat with us now?"

The advisor frowned and shook his head. "I'm afraid not, My Lord. And I must ask that you abandon your food for now as well, as I have something to discuss with you."

"But-" The tai-youkai was very unwilling to neglect the rest of his dinner.

"Go on, honey," interjected his aunt. "We'll save some for you and you can finish later." She smiled at him.

Sighing, Kotaromaru nodded and got up from the table. "Okay. I'll go."

Hani bowed gratefully to Kagome before leading his student away. "I apologize, My Lord," he offered once they were out of earshot of the others, heading - for some strange reason that Kotaromaru could not discern - towards the edge of town and the forest.

"It's all right, Hani," replied Kotaromaru, never really having been able to get angry at the man. And besides that, his curiosity had jumped to the fore. He asked, "Where are we going?"

"I'd like for us to speak in private, My Lord. Your uncle's forest is the ideal location. And, well, you'll see…"

His interest peaked, the tai-youkai spent the rest of the short journey in silence, wondering what could possibly be waiting for them at its end. It was not what he had imagined.

A boar-youkai was sitting on the edge of an old well, and Kotaromaru instantly recognized him as one of the palace sentries. The well he thought he had heard his aunt mention several times, usually before she disappeared to go visit her mother.

As Hani and his pupil approached the well the guard got to his feet. He bowed to them respectfully before proffering a scroll to Kotaromaru. "My Lord," he said with his head down, "A message from Master Ujitama."

The inu-youkai's heart sank like a stone in water. He frowned and reached hesitantly for the letter, but Hani got there first. He grabbed the scroll firmly and ordered the sentry to give them some privacy. The boar-youkai nodded and quickly scuttled off to wait in the trees. Then Hani turned back to Kotaromaru, who had adopted what appeared to be a look of grim resignation.

"He wants me to go back, doesn't he?"

"Only temporarily, My Lord. As we agreed."

The boy sighed. "I thought so."

Truthfully, despite his duty to mold him into a good ruler, Hani could not stand to see Kotaromaru upset, and so he said, "You know, My Lord… All previous obligations aside, you _are_ the tai-youkai. You don't actually have to do anything that does not please you."

For one small moment Kotaromaru's mind lit up with glee - _I don't have to go back! - _but then he remembered the promise he made for Minami, and knew that she would have wanted him to return, for many reasons. His honor, his pride… And for his own sake he acknowledged that Ujitama would be expecting him to bow out, and Kotaromaru did _not_ want to give the old rat the satisfaction of being right.

"No, Hani. I'll go," he declared, and his voice was stronger now.

The older youkai smiled affectionately. "Very well. We leave tomorrow morning, My Lord, so please do be ready, yes?" He inclined his head before turning and walking in the direction of the sentry who was still waiting in the cover of the forest.

Grinning, Kotaromaru raced back to the village, following the familiar scents. He found that dinner was just concluding as he made it back in the vicinity of the huts and shops. Unfortunately, he was still hungry. Being brave took a lot of energy, after all.

"Oi, pup!"

Kotaromaru's head swiveled in the direction of the well-known voice. "Uncle Inuyasha!" He made his way to the hanyou, who was sitting on a barrel outside Sango and Miroku's hut. Aunt Kagome was probably inside.

"What did Hani want?"

"Oh. Um." Kotaromaru scuffled his feet in the dirt. "Ujitama sent me a message. I have to visit the castle tomorrow-"

"I'm goin' with you."

The boy stared blankly in surprise. "What?"

"Did I stutter? I'm goin' with you, pup. Ain't no way I'm lettin' that bastard around you by yourself." Inuyasha huffed, and the look on his face made Kotaromaru understand that there was no arguing with him - not that he wanted to. He smiled.

"Okay, Uncle Inuyasha. We're leaving in the morning."

"Gotcha."

**OooOooOooOooO**

_Here's something for you to think about. How much danger could a simple trip from one location to another inspire? The answer is, a lot more than one might normally expect. I learned this the hard way when our journey was interrupted the next day by an unforeseen visitor. And, in my uncle's (ahem, humble) opinion, unwelcome. I, however, actually enjoyed the whole spectacle. Perhaps you'll see why when I elaborate…_

**OooOooOooOooO**

"We'll stop at the brook up ahead for a while, okay, pup?"

"All right," responded Kotaromaru, nodding at his uncle. The two of them, as well as Hani, were running through the woods as fast as they could, or at least as fast as Kotaromaru's shorter legs would allow. The young inu-youkai was growing tired; their small group had been traveling for at least three hours. It was almost noon, if the position of the sun in the sky was anything to go by. Kotaromaru did feel somewhat bad, too. If he were faster, his uncle and advisor wouldn't have had to slow down so much. They, however, were not uttering a single complaint, so he didn't let it get to him too much.

In a matter of seconds the sound of clean spring water rushing over rocks came to Kotaromaru's ears, and he put on a small burst of speed to reach the stream. He knelt on its bank and made quick work of drinking some of the fresh water from his cupped hands. "Yum!" he exclaimed, not caring if he sounded childish. "This is great."

Behind him, Hani chuckled. The owl-youkai dropped to his knees gracefully beside Kotaromaru and mimicked his actions - albeit with a much more civilized manner. The tai-youkai turned to ask Inuyasha why he wasn't joining them, but he stopped when he saw the hanyou's expression. It was suspicious, and he kept sniffing the air, then assuming an air of utter disgust.

"What is it, Uncle?" asked Kotaromaru.

"Fucking bastard," was the reply that he received, although Kotaromaru was pretty positive that the name was not directed at him. He was right.

"Long time, no see, mutt-face!"

"Why don't you come out here so I can kick your ass, you mangy wolf?"

And then Kotaromaru could put a face to the deep, cocky voice that he had not recognized. From the darker shadows of the forest, where the trees were thick, strutted a tall youkai with his hands on his hips, unmistakably the wolf that Inuyasha had addressed. He wore brown furs and armor over his waist and chest, and a band of the fuzzy pelt around his head that kept his sleek black hair out of his bright blue eyes. Kotaromaru stared in awe. He looked so _cool._

"Well, well, well. What have we here? The mongrel, a feather bag, and a little baby puppy, too!" The youkai threw his head back and laughed throatily.

Kotaromaru felt Hani stiffen at his side. His own temper raised a little as well. 'Baby'? He snorted. He was ten years old! Definitely _not_ a baby.

"Watch your mouth, Koga, unless you want it ripped from your ugly mug," countered Inuyasha, looking very annoyed. But his comment just made Koga laugh harder; Kotaromaru didn't know why - if his uncle had been looking at him with that much threat he would be shutting up faster than the time it would take to blink.

Through his hearty chuckles the wolf replied, "I'm not scared of you, mutt. But I'm also not here to beat you into the ground, even though I may want to-"

Inuyasha growled.

"-I'm just passing through. Going to see the bastard brother of yours, surprised he hasn't killed you yet-"

"What the hell are you talking about?" The inu-hanyou looked suspicious. Kotaromaru, annoyance gone, began listening intently. He stilled so much that he was barely breathing.

Koga rolled his eyes. "Your brother, dirt-for-brains? Sesshomaru? You know, that guy who is stronger and not as worthless as you?"

"Fuck you, Koga. I know who my damn brother is. What I don't know is how you think you can go see him when he's been missing ten years."

For a split second the wolf youkai looked startled, but the expression quickly morphed into a mixture of dislike and disbelief. "Yeah, right. Very funny, dog-breath."

Inuyasha's amber eyes hardened. "You don't believe me? Take a look right there." His clawed hand shot out over his shoulder, one calloused thumb pointing directly at Kotaromaru, who swallowed heavily in surprise. "See that pup? That's my nephew. Wanna know why he's here? 'Cause his dad ain't."

Koga's piercing blue stare fixated on the young tai-youkai, taking in his markings, his hair, his clothes. Kotaromaru knew he looked like Sesshomaru; he'd been told so many times. The wolf youkai must have realized it too, because a spark of recognition and then realization flared into his gaze, which he abruptly turned back on Inuyasha.

But he said, "I won't believe it till I see it myself, meathead. So lead the way."

"What?"

"You heard me. I'm coming with. For all I know you kidnapped the damn kid and are trying to escape with him or something. You bring me to Sesshomaru's castle and show me he's not there, and I'll believe you. Simple."

Inuyasha looked livid. "That's the stupidest logic I ever heard! And I am _not_ spending the rest of the whole trip with _you_ tagging along like… Like… Some kinda fungus!"

Despite the tension in the air, Kotaromaru giggled. Koga's eyes flared and he turned to face the boy again. "What's so funny, short stuff?" The wolf-youkai took a step forward, his long black ponytail swinging behind him.

At once, Inuyasha and Hani sprang to action, moving shoulder to shoulder to create a very tall, solid, and angry wall before the tai-youkai.

"Leave him alone, Koga," ordered the hanyou, deadly serious.

"You will not speak to the tai-youkai in such a way," added Hani.

Koga chuckled low. "Is that so? What kind of powerful lord-" he snorted, "-can't even stand up for himself, hm?"

Growling fiercely, Inuyasha was prepared to either tell the wolf off or punch him across the face, but he never did because, quite startlingly, he heard an even more agitated growl coming from behind him. A moment later, Kotaromaru pushed himself roughly through the slight space between his uncle and advisor's legs.

"I can so stand up for myself!" he declared, glaring at Koga with his pale brows drawn down in a scowl. Who on earth did the insolent youkai think he was talking to? First the wolf called him a baby, of all things, and now this? As long as he was set on being so brave, Kotaromaru felt he should exercise the emotion on someone besides just Ujitama. Koga needed to be put right.

Unfortunately, the only effect his bravery had on Koga was to make him laugh heartily again. When he was done he looked down at Kotaromaru with a twinkle in his eyes, who, despite being laughed at, was keeping up his "in charge" façade.

"You know," Koga said with a smirk. "Maybe you got more spunk than I thought. What's your name?"

The tai-youkai drew himself up as tall as he could and replied, in what he hoped was a condescending manner, "Kotaromaru."

"Is that so? Well it's a little too stuffy for me, short stuff. How about we just go with Kotaro, instead?"

Hani made a strangled noise behind him, but Kotaromaru didn't pay any attention. Truth be told, he liked the sound of "Kotaro"; the lack of the honorable ending made him feel kind of edgy and wild.

"Fine," he said to the wolf. "But no more 'short stuff' or I'll punish you for it."

Again, Koga started to roar hysterically. Through his laughter, however, he managed to gasp out, "I like you, kid. I like you a lot."

In spite of himself and the murderous scowls on both his advisor and uncle's faces, Kotaromaru smiled. He had a feeling the trip was about to get much more eventful.

**OooOooOooOooO**

_There you have it. Koga was true to his word; he followed us all the way to the castle at our slower pace even though he could have easily gone on ahead. I don't think I am required to tell you that Uncle Inuyasha adopted a perpetually bad mood from that point on. The two of them were on pins and needles every second, nearly getting into a full blown duel half a dozen times. Even Hani was much less than his normally pleasant self. He seemed to think that Koga did not show me nearly the proper amount of respect that I was due. For my part, that didn't bother me. The wolf-youkai was someone new and intriguing and I actually enjoyed his company a great deal. He told me old stories that involved my uncle and aunt that kept me laughing for hours. He informed me of his own mate back home in the northern part of the country. Her name is Ayame, and I would meet her some years later. But I'm getting too far ahead of myself. Let me back up._

_When we finally made it to the castle and established for Koga that my father was, in fact, missing, he began asking questions of Hani, who reluctantly filled him in on what had happened, starting with the death of Naraku. Koga had been away in the far, isolated north for so long that he knew virtually nothing about the goings on of the rest of the nation. And while he was being enlightened, Uncle Inuyasha and I met in the dining hall with Ujitama, who seemed incredibly determined to unveil any reason at all why I should be forced to leave Kaede's village and return to the palace. For perhaps the first fifteen minutes of the conversation, I stood my ground and would not let Ujitama dominate the discussion. But after that I'm embarrassed to say that my resolve wore away under his constant disapproval and skillfully cloaked insults. I probably would have ended up being moved back into the castle before midnight if it weren't for my uncle._

_Uncle Inuyasha took control after he realized that I had lost heart. For every condescending question he had a smart answer, and before the hour was up we were finished and leaving a fuming Ujitama behind us. And we were almost, _almost_ out of the grounds when the worst possible thing that could happen - in my mind - well, happened._

**OooOooOooOooO**

Kotaromaru trudged miserably in between Inuyasha and Hani - Koga walked behind them - as they headed for the front gate. His head drooped almost to the point where his chin grazed his chest. He could not believe how badly he had failed in his pursuit of being courageous. He was not brave in any way; if he had been he would certainly not have allowed the old rat-youkai to walk all over him like he had. Koga's words from earlier branded themselves in his mind's eye, glowing red and angry.

"_What kind of powerful lord can't even stand up for himself, hm?"_

Kotaromaru had the pressing urge to mash his hands against his ears, as if doing so would prevent him from hearing the taunt over and over again in his head.

"Oi! Runt!"

A most familiar and unwelcome voice sounded to his left, and Kotaromaru almost groaned in anxiety as he turned to face the source. Nagushoka, his fighting instructor.

The enormous bear ambled toward them, sneering as he did. His deadly axe hung over his shoulder. Inuyasha looked him up and down with contempt.

"Who the hell are you?"

And Nagushoka, who was three times as wide as the hanyou and at least two feet taller, did not, unsurprisingly, take kindly to such a greeting. "Excuse me, half-breed? Who do you think you are?"

"Stop, Nagushoka-san," spoke up Hani. His voice was quiet but firm, and the bear grudgingly stepped back with a loud snort. "Inuyasha-san, this man is Kotaromaru-sama's teacher in combat."

"That's right," declared Nagushoka, directing his gaze at the young tai-youkai. "And you aren't going anywhere without showing me how your weaponry skills are. You better have been practicing."

Kotaromaru felt like he might be sick. He had not been practicing at all, which Nagushoka must have known very well since the inu-youkai had left his halberd hanging in the weapons shed when he had gone with his uncle the first time around. And now the bear-youkai wanted to humiliate him before Inuyasha, Hani, and Koga, who would probably get a great laugh out of the ordeal.

"Well stop staring like a fish and come on already," ordered Nagushoka, who turned and walked in the direction of their usual sparring ground. Unable to think of an excuse against the idea, Kotaromaru was forced to follow, with the other three men in tow.

When they reached the place Kotaromaru was surprised to see that his halberd was already there. Noting his expression, his instructor said, "I heard you were coming from Ujitama and decided it would be a good time to assess your skill level." There was a hint of amusement in his voice. He expected the tai-youkai to be awful and Kotaromaru thought sadly that he probably wouldn't be disappointed.

Numbly, he mumbled, "Thank you for readying Danryokusei for me, sensei."

"My pleasure," Nagushoka replied with a nasty tone in his voice. "Now get into your starting stance - if you still remember how, that is."

Kotaromaru complied, picking up his weapon and gripping it tightly - his knuckles turned whiter than snow - while spreading his feet to a shoulder-width apart. Every second he felt more and more resolved to his dreaded fate. The bear-youkai would beat him easily, and then he would truly be known for the disgrace that he was. A tai-youkai that couldn't fight properly. The son of the great and fearsome Sesshomaru, unable to use a sword. His stomach did a funny feeling sort of somersault.

"I won't go easy on you, whelp! Now be ready!"

And without any more warning, Nagushoka was in action, charging forward with the force of a hurricane, his battle axe gleaming menacingly from where it was poised above his head. The threat of imminent failure grabbed Kotaromaru and held him close, feeling like a thousand buckets of ice water dumped over his head. He stood, frozen to the ground, and before he could tear himself out of his stupor Nagushoka was there - right in front of him - swinging his axe down in a huge arch.

The young inu-youkai barely managed to dodge the attack; the blade of his opponent's weapon clipped the side of Danryokusei and suddenly his center of gravity had changed. He was losing his balance, falling backwards onto the cold, unforgiving earth. Nagushoka was looming over him, ready to strike again. Kotaromaru braced both of his small hands on the wide surface of his halberd and used it to shield him from the next swing. Then he held Danryokusei to his body and rolled to the left, wincing when Nagushoka's loud roar and heavy stomping reached his sensitive ears.

Kotaromaru scrambled to his feet - his heart was racing so fast he thought it might be trying to escape his body - and turned to face his teacher. The bear looked wild, his eyes and nostrils were wide. "Stop running and face me like a man!" he yelled, spit flying from his monstrous jaws.

The rest of the world had vanished around Kotaromaru. It was only he and Nagushoka, the arena, and the heavy weapons in their hands. He no longer had the capacity in his mind to entertain worries about what his uncle or Hani would think of him. All of his brain was employed in trying to just stay standing, to avoid the danger of being beheaded or sliced in half. All his senses were on overdrive, maintaining a state of awareness that the tai-youkai didn't know even existed. He could hear Nagushoka's feet shift, knew that the bear-youkai was preparing to run at him again.

_Jump_, his mind commanded, and Kotaromaru heeded the call. Nagushoka barreled towards him only to swipe at empty air when his target was suddenly soaring ten feet over his head. Kotaromaru landed lightly - swaying only a tiny bit due to his halberd - facing his instructor's back. For only a split second he realized that he had the advantage and the opportunity to strike, but so caught up in congratulating himself was he that soon the moment was gone and Nagushoka was staring at him again, angrier than ever. His giant arm reared back, axe in hand, and then whipped forward with astounding speed. The axe flew out of his grip and was sent spinning fatally through the air.

Kotaromaru had not foreseen this new development. He ducked low to the arena floor with Danryokusei over his head. Even so, he felt the current of wind that the axe made when it reeled over him, and heard the _whoosh_ that followed in its wake. A tiny glimmer of silver fell before his line of sight and he recognized the source as a few pieces of his own shiny hairs, neatly cut from their strands by Nagushoka's weapon. His throat very quickly became rather constricted.

Across the arena from him, the huge bear laughed. "You're pathetic, _my lord_. Instead of fighting you just run away."

Kotaromaru did not argue the declaration; he much agreed with it, himself. Instead he stood back up straight and waited for the next blow to come, already going through the ways to dodge it in his mind. He didn't have long to wait. Nagushoka came at him again and again, opting on short range attacks so that Kotaromaru would have very little chance of getting away.

The tai-youkai was forced to defend himself from the onslaught by hiding ashamedly behind Danryokusei. The force of every strike made his arms waver and his ears ring, but he couldn't do much of anything else. Nagushoka was relentless, seemingly possessing unlimited amounts of stamina. He halted for nothing, and backed up each swing with a fierce grunt. Kotaromaru thought wearily that if his wrists broke he might be spared from dueling any longer, but even that was unlikely, since the bear-youkai had never granted him mercy for any other reason.

He was being pushed backwards ever so gradually; he could feel the ground sliding beneath his feet and knew any moment he would be knocked out onto the grass that surrounded the fighting ring. But just as the edge was digging into his heels, an infuriated shout stopped the next and final hit from coming. At this point Kotaromaru's golden eyes were squeezed shut in dread, but when he discovered that he was still on his feet and not unconscious in the dirt, he opened them and found a surprising sight.

Inuyasha was in the arena, stalking towards Nagushoka with his sword drawn, cursing angrily. The great Tetsusaiga shone brilliantly for a moment before it was shadowed by the bear-youkai's large form. "I said leave him the fuck alone," Inuyasha snarled.

"Stay out of this, hanyou," responded Nagushoka, turning to face the smaller man, Kotaromaru forgotten.

"Like hell I will. What are you trying to prove? That you can defeat a ten year old? Well congratulations, bastard, you did it. Now get the fuck away from him."

"I'm teaching him a lesson. How can he be expected to be tai-youkai if he can't even-"

"And how do _you_ expect him to learn properly when all you're doing is trying to maul him?"

"If he is too weak to-" Nagushoka began, but the next second his words turned into a strangled growl as an irate hanyou pressed the blade of the Tetsusaiga to his throat.

"My nephew," he ground out through clenched teeth, "is _not_ weak." Then he was wheeling around sharply on his feet and stomping away, his sword sheathed once more. "Come on, pup," he hollered over his shoulder. "We're leaving."

Stunned, Kotaromaru skittered around Nagushoka and ran after his uncle, halberd still in hand. The bear-youkai did not even call after them.

As he walked out of the castle with Inuyasha, Hani, and Koga, the young inu-youkai felt strangely like he should apologize for what had just transpired. Hesitantly, he started, "Uncle, I-"

But Inuyasha interrupted him. "Save it, pup. Wait until we get home."

The way the hanyou said it confused Kotaromaru, as if something was waiting for them back in Kaede's village. "What happens when we get home?" he asked.

"You're getting some _real_ training, that's what."

**--------------------------------------------------**

**AN: I'm awful at writing any kind of action scenes and so this chapter took me an enormous amount of time to get right. I'm still a little unsatisfied with it… If anyone has any advice about action scenes, I would love to hear it.**

**Also, this chapter is humbly dedicated to BrownRecluse, who nominated this story in two categories (best AU and best OC) of the IY Fanguild's second quarter contests. Thank you, so much. I'm honored.**

**And finally, I've recently put up a website dedicated to this story and my future fanfictions. You can find my blog there, which gives some information about this story you won't find anywhere else. You might see a few other interesting things, as well... The link is in my profile.**

**Disclaimer: **_**Inuyasha**_ **is property of one Ms. Rumiko Takahashi. And thank gosh for that, because if I owned it you would be running for your life. Toodles.**


	8. Seven: Hold Your Own

**AN: I want to apologize heavily for the long wait. Besides being busy with school, I recently had a few stressful and unpleasant things to deal with, and I couldn't seem to get myself in the mood to write. But now I'm back, and it feels great. Enjoy.**

**-Chapter Seven-**

**-Hold Your Own-**

"_Feel the fear and do it anyways."_

_- Unknown_

_  
_--

The agitated growling disturbed the relative quiet of the otherwise peaceful forest. The source of the noise was one silver haired, dog eared hanyou, who was moving stiffly with a scowl on his face.

"Remind me again why I haven't killed him yet?" Inuyasha said to Hani, who also appeared somewhat unhappy. The owl-youkai did not answer. Instead he narrowed his orange gaze at the pair of youkai walking in front of them - more, in particular, at the taller one.

Kaede's village was only another ten minutes of walking from their current location, and both Hani and Inuyasha had had quite enough of the cocky wolf who decided to follow them home, completely ignoring the inu half-breed's outraged objections and declarations of, "The hell you are!"

Kotaromaru, on the other hand, was obviously not bothered by the added company. In fact, he spent most of the trek home ignoring his uncle and advisor in favor of swapping more stories with the wolf, who was only too happy to divulge unflattering information about Inuyasha.

"Mmm," the young pup gushed, sniffing the air. "I can smell dinner from here. Oh, I can't wait to see what Aunt Kagome made!"

At the mention of the miko, Koga brightened even more. "I finally get to eat some of Kagome's cooking, eh?"

"Fuck, no, you flea-bag."

Ignoring Inuyasha's outburst, Koga continued, "She'll probably be so happy to see me that she'll give me a kiss!"

The next instant found an irate hanyou - growling for all he was worth - lunging at the unsuspecting wolf-youkai with every intent to cause as much bodily harm as he could. Unfortunately his attack was cut short by an excited squeal.

"_Papa!_"

Inuyasha barely managed to steady himself in time to catch his five year old daughter as she launched herself into his arms. Wrapping her little arms around his neck, she drew herself up until she could reach his cheek and placed a sloppy, loud kiss on it. His anger almost seemed to melt away. Kotaromaru couldn't blame him. Miyami had that effect on people.

"Hey, pup," Inuyasha greeted the girl, tweaking one of the fuzzy, triangular dog ears perched on her head - just like his own.

"I missed you, Papa. I'm glad you're back." She flashed him a completely endearing smile before turning it on Kotaromaru as well. "You, too!"

The tai-youkai grinned. "Thanks, Miyami."

Suddenly her gaze lighted on Koga, the only unfamiliar one of the group, and she looked somewhat intimidated. "Who's that?"

Snorting indelicately, Inuyasha replied, "He ain't nobody, little girl. Just a mangy wolf, so don't worry about him."

"Okay," Miyami agreed with a replenished smile.

The wolf-youkai in question sneered in Inuyasha's direction. "Don't tell me Kagome actually had _pups_ with you, mutt? What did you do, get her drunk?"

Kotaromaru didn't even bat an eye; in the nearly two days since Koga had joined them, he had grown used to the consistency of the fighting between the two older men. What did surprise him, however, was that instead of the menacing snarl he expected, Inuyasha just responded with a bored, "Keh," and started to walk away.

"Whatsa' matter, dog-breath? A little too much truth there for ya?"

"Hardly, wolf-shit. I don't need to fight this one; I already won."

Koga rolled his startling blue eyes. "How so?"

And Inuyasha, grin flashing snarkily as he turned his head, didn't miss a beat in replying, "I got Kagome, _and_ her pups. How do you top that?" Then, without sparing another glance at the dumbstruck wolf-youkai, he pushed off from the ground with his arms securely around his daughter and soared over the trees, out of sight.

**OooOooOooOooO**

_Suffice to say that my uncle's uncharacteristically witty comeback efficiently kept Koga from talking until he, Hani, and I reached the village. And I'll admit that the altercation did amuse me, yet all the same, it also left me with a little confusion._

_Koga had, after all, already informed me that he had a mate. I knew he wasn't lying - I could smell her all over him. Therefore, his preoccupation with my aunt didn't make much sense. Not one to be discreet, I asked him about it as we were waiting outside my aunt and uncle's hut for them to join us for dinner, which was already set out quite spectacularly on the usual long wooden table in the grass._

_Koga's answer was a long sigh and a smile that bespoke long since past memories. "Yeah, Kotaro. I almost forgot I told you about Ayame."_

"_What's she like?" I wanted to know._

"_Hah. She's beautiful, kid. Real great. And trust me, I would never betray her. She's gonna have my pup soon, you know? But this isn't about her, at all."_

"_Isn't it?"_

"_Nah. I've always been promised to Ayame, since way before I met Kagome. There wasn't ever really a question, in my mind, that I would be with her. But your aunt… She's something, kid. She really is. I never _honestly_ expected her to be with me, no matter how many times I asked. I just hate to see her be with that mutt, is all. I mean, if not me, she could have at least picked someone _decent_."_

_I thought that was a little unfair, considering. Uncle Inuyasha was more than decent, in my mind. A little brash, sure, but a good man. I didn't say that to Koga, though. He might have known it already. I think he and Uncle just fought out of habit, because they didn't really know how else to treat each other. I understood that habit was also where the urge to flirt with my aunt came from in Koga. I left it at that, satisfied with his answer, and minutes later the rest of my family was with us, laughing and talking. _

_I remember that meal being one of the best I'd ever had. Hani had even joined the table, and was discussing something or other quite politely with Shippo, who had stopped reminiscing about the 'old times' with Koga, like Miroku, Sango, and Aunt Kagome were still doing. I remember my uncle sitting with a rather dejected look on my aunt's left, muttering under his breath about stinking wolves and traitorous wenches. And I remember the unwavering smile that seemed almost glued to my face. I remember that just for a moment, all my worries about being defeated by Nagushoka and humiliated by Ujitama faded, and that if only for a second, I forgot._

**OooOooOooOooO**

The sun was long since gone. Inuyasha stepped outside of his home to look about the village, his golden eyes almost glowing from the light of the moon as they absorbed the scenery. He was grateful for the quiet that had fallen shortly after that damned wolf had finally left, spouting things like "I gotta get back before Ayame gets upset" and "Don't hesitate to call for me if you ever get sick of the mutt, Kagome."

Good riddance, in Inuyasha's opinion. He just felt guilty that poor Ayame would have to put up with the bastard again. He could only hope that any of the wolf's spawn would actually be respectable youkai; they would have to rely solely on their mother for that, of course.

A ghost of a sigh, more like a slightly more forceful exhalation of breath than anything else, caught the attention of Inuyasha's sensitive triangular ears. The swiveled in the direction of the noise, and the hanyou's head followed them. His eyes lit upon the shadowed but unmistakable form of Kotaromaru - leaning against the wall of his hut with his halberd resting against his chest, the sharp tip of it digging softly into the packed dirt of the ground.

Quietly and deliberately, Inuyasha strolled over to stand by his nephew's side. The boy did not even look up. "Oi, pup. Whattaya doin' out here? Thought you went to sleep?"

Kotaromaru's silver head shook slowly. "I couldn't." His voice was dull, like someone had painted its tones in shades of gray.

Gaze shifting around to look at his own dwelling, to make sure his mate and children were still snoozing soundly, Inuyasha nodded when he saw that all the lights were still out before fully resting his weight on the wall next to the tai-youkai and asked, "Why's that?"

All he received in return was a shrug and a noncommittal grunt. The hanyou sighed inwardly; he had feared that this conversation would be difficult. He had hoped it wouldn't be.

"That damn wolf didn't say anything stupid to you, did he?"

"No."

"Then what's bothering you?"

"Nothing."

Inuyasha didn't buy that for a second, and he was beginning to feel frustrated. Knowing he didn't want to scare the boy off, though, he reigned in his irritation and said calmly, "I ain't stupid, pup. Just tell me what's up."

Kotaromaru continued to stare down at his weapon, twisting it idly in his hands as though he was looking for the best angle with which to see his reflection in the blade. It seemed for a minute or so that he would not speak, but then he muttered, "Koga was right," in such a sad voice that Inuyasha swore if the youkai had been born with dog ears they would have flattened right to his skull.

"About what?"

"About me not being a powerful lord."

Inuyasha snorted. "Oh, really? And why the hell do you think that?"

The expression on Kotaromaru's face was nothing short of self-loathing. "I'm not brave, or strong. I couldn't stand up to Ujitama and Nagushoka would have killed me if he had really been trying."

The hanyou had to resist the urge to snarl at the reminder of the brutal bear-youkai and his so called "training session". He wanted to object to the boy's depressed statements, but Kotaromaru hadn't finished.

"And I'll never be a great sword fighter like my father was, even though everyone expects me to be. I don't deserve Danryokusei because all I do is _hide_ behind it!" His little voice was rising in volume and pitch with every word; the smell of fresh, salty tears permeated the night air. "How could I ever be a good tai-youkai when I couldn't even stand up for myself against people who are supposed to work for _me_?"

His last sentiment came out so quietly that even Inuyasha had to strain to hear it. "I was just… so _scared_."

Inuyasha could feel his chest aching with the weight of what his nephew had just revealed. He was startled once again into noticing the similarities they shared: the burden of living in an inescapable shadow - the one cast by the unshakable Sesshomaru - and the desire to be brave and independent. He knew how smothering those things could be, and didn't have to look at the boy's face to know that he was probably crying freely now.

"Scared of what?" Inuyasha inquired softly over the lump in his throat, the question coming out in his usual gruff tone but wearing a cloak of gentleness.

"Everything," the tai-youkai sniffed miserably. "Of being beaten… Of letting Ujitama get the best of me… again." His shining golden eyes darted upward for a fraction of a second, taking in the hanyou's welcoming stance, then rotating quickly back down to absorb the ground. "Of disappointing you."

Shocked into immobility by these words, Inuyasha found his brain moving at a crawl. Kotaromaru was afraid of disappointing him? Didn't he know he could never do that? But another second later Inuyasha realized that no, he did not understand the formidable pride that a parent or a guardian felt for their young. Few children ever did comprehend the sensation until they had their own charges to take care of. It was just a part of a pup's mentality, but the hanyou didn't want Kotaromaru to ever think that way.

"Keh! As if that'd ever happen."

The young tai-youkai looked up again, this time not looking away, bewilderment writ on his forehead.

"Listen to me, pup. You can't let me down. You just can't. It's impossible. You think I would think any less of you for not being able to handle a sword yet? Not in a million years." Inuyasha crossed his arms, stuffing his hands into the sleeves of his Fire-Rat robe as if that was the end of that particular matter.

Kotaromaru, however, did not appear to be placated. "Not only that, but… I was _terrified_, Uncle. When I was fighting Nagushoka-sensei, all I wanted to do was run away."

"Hmmph. With that crazy fucking bastard as your opponent, you'd be stupid _not_ to be scared at least a little bit."

If anything, that only worsened the inu-youkai's confusion. His silver brows drew together in a frown. "I don't understand."

Inuyasha fixed his nephew with a hard stare, every line in his face stressing the importance of what he was about to say. "Being brave ain't about not being scared, pup. Someone with no fear is a fool who is bound to get himself killed for being too cocky. You gotta have confidence, but not too much of it. Bravery is doing what must be done _in spite_ of being afraid."

Kotaromaru digested that in silence, and the wrinkles in his brow slowly smoothed out. Taking the opportunity to add one last thing, Inuyasha told the boy, "You went back to the castle. You talked to that rat bastard and you fought your teacher even though you didn't want to do any of those things. That took guts, pup."

And ever so slowly in the calm of the night, Kotaromaru smiled.

**OooOooOooOooO**

_I went to sleep that night with my head quite full, but my heart much lighter than it had previously been. Needless to say, I kept the words my uncle offered quite close, and looked back on them often. To my pleasure, they would be rather useful over the course of the next few months, when Uncle Inuyasha made good on his word and taught me the art of sword fighting himself. It was a memorable experience, training side by side with the famous Tetsusaiga. Even better than that, was that my uncle approved of the Danryokusei, although he said he was actually impartial to halberds. When I asked why, he just said, "You wouldn't like them either if some crazy undead mercenary tried cuttin' you open with one."_

_Of course, that made little sense to me until sometime later, when I finally heard the story of Bankotsu of the Band of Seven and his Banryuu. _

_But I digress. Like I was saying, Uncle thought my weapon was a good one - strong, durable, and since it was made from my own fang, it was bonded to me. A faithful and valuable protector, indeed._

_I simply cannot explain to you the joy that came with finally being able to wield it, either. To be in complete control, to possess the ability to devastate an opponent with a single blow but also the discipline to avoid causing injury… It was intoxicating._

**OooOooOooOooO**

"Good, pup! Now get back in the middle and try it again."

Watching his nephew like a hawk, Inuyasha prowled around the edge of the makeshift arena he and Miroku had constructed. Kotaromaru was in the center, his white hakama dirty and hair mussed. Other than that, though, he looked fine. Fantastic, even, since his practice was going so unbelievably well. It was amazing what he had accomplished thus far with Inuyasha as his instructor. Only three weeks had passed since they had started and already the tai-youkai had learned more than some three years worth of training with Nagushoka had taught him.

"It's cuz' I ain't a bastard," the hanyou had said haughtily when Kotaromaru made a note of it. Kagome, who had been looking on, had rolled her eyes but smiled.

The only thing still bothering the young youkai was that even though the moves were easier to perform, he still had to _work_ to get them right. How many times over the years had he heard about his father's natural talent? Far too many to count, for sure. Kotaromaru had been under the notion that once the steps were explained to him accurately, he would just pick them up with ease, like Sesshomaru once had. This, it seemed, was not going to be the case. Instead, he spent long hours going through the motions repeatedly while Inuyasha and sometimes Hani stood nearby, shouting encouragement and pointers.

He did have to admit, however, that even such a tedious process was preferred over anything he had endured with his former sensei. So what if he wasn't a natural? At least he was no longer a failure. And he observed proudly that his extra efforts paid off immensely in the form of muscle and sheer ability.

Inuyasha had noticed as well.

"That's it, Kotaromaru. Why don't we leave off there?" The hanyou suggested, grinning in response to the glowing pleasure emanating from the boy's face as he landed one maneuver perfectly. It was nearly sunset; dinnertime had transpired at least an hour ago. The two of them had skipped out on the meal, bound and determined to see improvement before the day was done.

Kotaromaru dragged a bare arm across his forehead, ridding the surface of the warm sweat that was accumulating there. That also served to smudge a trail of dirt across the skin, but he paid it no heed. He would require a bath anyway. The whole of his chest was covered in earth and the inu-youkai was willing to bet his back was in no better state. Even so, it was too hot to be training with a haori on, despite the fact that fall was merely days away. The humidity was still prevalent, and all the physical exertion did not help in the least. Also, even though he wouldn't admit it out loud, Kotaromaru rather liked the golden tan he had developed in recent days. It was almost as dark as Inuyasha's.

"Go clean up and then I'm sure your aunt will have something for you to eat."

Kotaromaru nodded in agreement with his uncle's words, handing over Danryokusei when the hanyou stuck his hand out for it, then jogged off in the direction of the closest stream. At the bank of the current he shed his hakama and slid in, allowing the water to wash over him. He rubbed the filth from his body and dunked his head underwater once before climbing back onto dry land and donning his bottoms again, making a mental note to change them as soon as he returned to the village.

"Hey! Kotaromaru!"

The tai-youkai looked up for his golden eyes to confirm what his keen nose already told him was true. Kyuichi was walking in his direction with a wooden pole slung over his shoulders, an empty bucket attached to each end with a length of rope. Kotaromaru scowled just as his cousin reached him.

"You just get done training?"

"Obviously."

Kyuichi smirked cheekily. "You must suck pretty bad if you're just learning how to fight now."

"I do _not_ suck."

"Oh, yeah? Why don'cha prove it then?"

The elder boy's eyes narrowed. "How?"

Hanyou ears twitched with annoyance, as if the answer was obvious. "A challenge, of course! Spar me. I'll win for sure, and then you'll know that you suck."

Kotaromaru snorted. "Fighting you doesn't sound like much of a challenge," he retorted, even though he had been dreading that very thing ever since coming to Kaede's village.

"Hah! If that's what you think, then you won't have any reason to say no. So that's that. Tomorrow after dinner, you're going down!"

Before Kotaromaru even got a chance to refuse or accept the offer, Kyuichi turned and practically skipped away with excitement, completely forgetting to fill the water buckets he arrived with in his preoccupation.

The tai-youkai smashed a palm to his forehead and groaned.

**OooOooOooOooO**

"Ow! That hurt!"

"I hope so! Your mother asked you to get water. Where the hell is it?"

"I forgot, okay?"

"Keh!"

Kotaromaru was laughing. He couldn't help it. Miyami, Sachiko, and Yoshio were following suit. They had not even bothered trying to contain their amusement when Inuyasha had started reprimanding Kyuichi for his forgetfulness. Their source of entertainment only lasted a short while, however, since Kagome joined them and said, "It's okay, Inuyasha. We have enough for now. He'll just have to go tomorrow evening."

But Kyuichi grinned. "Can't, Mama. I gotta match to fight tomorrow."

All at once, Kotaromaru felt his heart stop beating. The next second it was pounding a painful tattoo into his ribcage.

Kagome frowned. "You do? Against who?"

If it was possible, the young inu-hanyou's smile widened, threatening to split his head in two. "Kotaromaru."

Inuyasha rounded on his nephew. "Is that true?" His amber eyes flashed.

The tai-youkai felt cornered, nervous. If he said no, he would be lying to his uncle. If he said yes… Well, that would be just as bad of an outcome. But Inuyasha's gaze was already seeing right through him, and he knew there was no use in giving a false answer.

Reluctantly, he nodded, not trusting his voice to come out without squeaking embarrassingly. Inuyasha's gaze grew even more appraising, but he said not a word. Instead, he jerked his head once in acknowledgement and walked away.

Smiling madly, Kyuichi exclaimed, "You better be ready, Kotaromaru," before jogging after his father.

So it was that the very next afternoon, with the late summer sun beating hard upon their backs, that nearly half of the townspeople found themselves gathered uncomfortably close around Inuyasha's arena on the edge of the woods. Kyuichi had taken it gladly upon himself to inform them all that there was going to be a "proper tai-youkai ass-beating" around noon, for which he was pounded rather heavily over the head when Inuyasha found out.

Kagome, Miyami, Hani, Miroku, Sango, and all of the latter two's offspring had shown up, standing closer than all the rest, on the tai-youkai's side of the ring. The twins kept smiling broadly at Kotaromaru, showing their support, and Miyami had even made a sign out of a large leaf that had his name painted on. She waved it energetically every five minutes or so.

At Kyuichi's end of the arena Inuyasha was talking in a low voice to the boy, about what Kotaromaru had no idea. It was making him nervous. Actually, all of it was: the attention, the sign, the grins. The only thing that had helped at all was his aunt's quiet but reassuring, "You'll do just fine," in his ear, whispered before she sat down beside Sango with Senko in her arms.

When the sun was directly above their heads - all the shadows had disappeared and even without a haori on Kotaromaru was sweating unbearably - Inuyasha took his place on the middle of the border of the ring, hands stuffed into his red sleeves in customary fashion. He sent a quick nod to each of the opponents, and it had begun.

Kyuichi did not waste time - his immediate charge into the match reminded Kotaromaru frighteningly of Nagushoka, and for a second he felt the fingers of panic tugging at his mind. His cousin reached him quickly and attacked with a horizontal swipe of his weapon that would have cut across Kotaromaru's midsection neatly if he hadn't sprung backward at the last moment. An onslaught of memories were banging upon his brain, begging him to remember how closely he had come to being decapitated by his former sensei.

Suddenly, however, as Kyuichi was advancing for yet another swing, a curious thing happened. The young inu-hanyou laughed in amusement and the tai-youkai's mentality reset.

Inuyasha's efforts at teaching his nephew how to be a real fighter had not gone to waste. Kotaromaru's sharpened mindset, the one he learned to use to block out any extraneous thoughts while focusing on the battle, had kicked into gear. It assessed rather swiftly that Kyuichi's voice was much, _much_ higher pitched than Nagushoka's. Subsequently, he was, if he was lucky, perhaps about one sixth of the bear's size. Most importantly, his sword, while certainly still dangerous, was not nearly as intimidating in appearance as the axe that the advisor preferred.

All at once, Kotaromaru's cousin seemed incredibly easier to face. Reacting on instinct, Kotaromaru dodged the next swipe without effort. He took off at a fast pace once he his the ground, using his longer legs to the advantage. Behind him Kyuichi was following, still chuckling since he probably thought that the tai-youkai was still running away. Kotaromaru almost smiled.

He reached the boundaries of the arena and turned on his heel, holding Danryokusei out so that its broad side was facing his oncoming cousin, who had realized only a nanosecond too late that he was going too quickly to stop himself in time.

Kyuichi dug his heels into the ground and even stuck his katana in, blade forward, but that helped little. In the next moment he was sprawled painfully on his back, his face having made a very unpleasant meeting with the halberd's surface. That time, Kotaromaru allowed himself a smirk. Then he hopped back to his side of the field, knowing that the hanyou would not stay down long, using his embarrassment to help him if nothing else.

He was right; Kyuichi was on his feet again in no time, glowering at the tai-youkai with shame and annoyance plain on his features. A brown piece of grass stuck comically to one of his flattened dog ears. "You were just lucky," he said.

Feeling proud of himself, Kotaromaru glanced at his uncle, hoping to find some form of approval there. Disappointingly, Inuyasha's face was unreadable. But his eyes were another story - telegraphing a message to Kotaromaru that he could only determine to say, '_Go get 'em.'_

Going on the offensive wasn't something Kotaromaru was sure he was ready to do yet. What if he messed up? What if he embarrassed himself and disappointed-

Familiar words floated through his head.

"_You can't let me down. You just can't. It's impossible."_

Kyuichi was running at him, sword held high once again, brow drawn down in frustration and determination. And Kotaromaru could duck, swerve - or he could _attack_-

And his cousin was gaining speed, almost appearing like a silvery streak coming right at him-

Danryokusei pulsed powerfully in his calloused hands, feeling like a second heartbeat, more steady and life-ensuring than his own, and he _knew-_

Kyuichi was almost upon him; he had perhaps two seconds before the hanyou brought his blade down over his skull, but the tai-youkai had already made up his mind - was already shifting his weight forward, pushing off the ground with so much conviction he could feel it in the tips of his fangs-

A split second before the halberd came into contact with his body Kyuichi's yellow eyes widened in surprise - was he about to be bested again? - and Kotaromaru _smiled_-

The Danryokusei pulsed again, stronger this time, as it connected with the hanyou's stomach. Its blade _glowed_ white like a scorching flame but in his fingers Kotaromaru could feel its temperature drop to a freezing chill. Gales of wind burst from the metal, followed immediately by miniscule droves of icy pebble-like shards that projected forward with deadly speed. Kyuichi _screamed-_

And then there was silence. Kotaromaru could feel his heart pummeling his insides, hear his breath rushing in his own pointed ears. No one around the ring was moving a muscle. His cousin was on his back, and the tai-youkai watched small blood stains seep out of the scattered wounds inflicted by Danryokusei's explosion - like crimson flowers laid on his body.

"_No,_" the word came out on an exhalation of air, and he dropped to his knees. His weapon fell with a heavy thud by his side, no longer seeming alive or powerful. Kotaromaru's hands itched to touch Kyuichi, to shake him until he woke up, laughing and boasting obnoxiously like old times…

Inuyasha had moved somewhere between the time it took for the fight to finish and his nephew to half-collapse. His hand was on Kotaromaru's shoulder, squeezing slightly. "Get up, pup. He's fine."

"But, Uncle, he-"

But Inuyasha did not give the boy anymore time to protest. He tightened his grip and pulled the tai-youkai back to his feet. "I said he's fine." Now Kagome was approaching them as well.

"But he's _unconscious!"_ argued Kotaromaru, unable to prevent his voice from rising in pitch.

His aunt said from her newfound position by her son, "Your uncle is right, sweetie. Kyuichi is just fine. The wounds aren't serious."

Kotaromaru swiveled around to face her. "Are you sure?"

Kagome smiled. "Yes. In fact, he probably only fainted because you scared him so much."

"Keh. That'll teach him not to make challenges with opponents he can't beat. Kami knows he don't listen to me when I try to tell him the same damn thing."

"Does that sound like anyone else we know, Inuyasha?" asked Miroku, who had joined them as well. His grin was indulgent.

The hanyou just snorted. "Don't know what you're talking about."

"Of course you don't."

Kotaromaru had watched the light exchange with relative calm, but he hadn't quite shaken his worry yet. "Uncle," he tugged lightly on the Fire Rat haori, "He really is all right?"

Inuyasha looked down, and there was an unexpected light in his eyes. "Yeah, pup. Now cheer up. You won."

The young inu-youkai helped Inuyasha carry Kyuichi back to the village and set him up in his room. Kagome and Sango spent the next hour or so cleaning up and patching the boy's wounds. They reported upon finishing that whatever had come from the halberd and pierced the hanyou's skin had disappeared. When Shippo checked the arena he couldn't find any of the strange pebbles either.

Villagers who watched the match stopped Kotaromaru to pat him on the back when they passed, and he listened to Miyami exclaim over the finer points of it all for nearly an hour as if he hadn't been there in person. But nothing really settled in until he was carefully hanging Danryokusei on its proper place in the room Inuyasha designated the "weapon shed".

_He won._ Fair and square. He defeated Kyuichi, who had been training with a sword since the age of five, in a duel and come out victorious.

For not the first time in his life Kotaromaru wondered if his father was dead and if he was somehow watching over him from wherever it was dead people went. He wondered if, even if it was only a little, Sesshomaru had watched his achievement, and was proud.

--

**The longest chapter yet. Remember that constructive criticism is always welcome.**

**Disclaimer:** _**Inuyasha**_ **is property of one Ms. Rumiko Takahashi. And thank gosh for that, because if I owned it you would be running for your life. Toodles.**


	9. Eight: Electricity

**WARNING: Heed rating! Lime-ish type content at the end of this chapter.**

**AN: This is the longest chapter yet, clocking in at over 8,000 words. The last one was only about 5,500 words. Phew! You guys inspire me to go to such lengths. Thank you.**

**-Chapter Eight-**

**-Electricity-**

"_There is only trouble and desire." - Simple Men_

--

_Believe me when I say that Danryokusei's sudden outburst was quite the unexpected phenomenon, to myself just as much as to Kyuichi and all the spectators who showed up that afternoon. After all the commotion simmered down and my cousin awoke with his usual fervor, spouting the nonsensical banter that was commonplace to him, Uncle Inuyasha and I returned to the arena to see if we could recreate the event. Of course, I only agreed to do so once he promised not to let me hurt him._

_Two days and dozens of unsuccessful attempts later, we struck proverbial gold. My blade thrummed in my grip, feeling almost like an extension of myself. That unique bond would only grow with time, my uncle told me, if I treated Danryokusei with respect and continued to use it well. Between the two of us we deducted rather cleverly that the reason no evidence of the attack had remained was because the pebble-like shards were indeed made of ice, and had melted shortly after hitting the ground. Uncle made me practice the move over and over again until I could perform it at will. The final step, he said, was to give it a name._

_And so the Hyoushou no Bakuha was born. It was the first of many techniques that my halberd would reveal to me. Soon after came the Hyoumenhoko, and the Moufubuki. Each new attack brought with it a renewed excitement and sense of accomplishment. It also became rather obvious that my specialty would be dealing with the colder elements. Thinking back on it now I find it oddly… fitting. You would too, if you remembered my father's outstanding personality. One word that always arose when describing him was 'cold'. _

_In any case, the discovery of my blade's abilities, if anything, only served to immensely increase the amount of time I spent training. I was determined to perfect my every move, so much so that Uncle often invited others to join us and help. Hani kept returning, as did Miroku and Shippo. However, the one who showed up more than anyone else was none other than Kyuichi, who decided if he couldn't beat me he would just learn beside me._

_You might think that sparring with my cousin would do nothing but increase our rivalry. Surprisingly, this was not the case at all. In fact, it built a respect and trust between us that I don't think we could have reached on our own, being such different people. That is not to say that Kyuichi and I stopped bickering or ever admitted that we could tolerate each other; however, we were able to come to an unspoken understanding of sorts. _

_So by the time I was fourteen and Kyuichi was eleven, we were both rather accomplished and - in all honesty - full of ourselves, in the particular field of dueling, anyway. _

_But once again, I digress. What I'm leading up to here is that for five years my life at the village went on as normal as it could. I trained and learned and visited the castle every so often as promised. I helped my uncle build huts for new residents, picked herbs with Sachiko for the doctor, even received a youkai kitten for my thirteenth birthday that was the grandson of Sango's companion, Kirara. I named him Aisoku, mostly because my mother had always loved felines, but for some reason he grew an affinity for Kyuichi over me and started following him around. Who'd have imagined?_

_Nothing truly interesting or note-worthy came upon me until the tail end of winter - the middle of February - reared its head when I was fifteen. Uncle Inuyasha was visited by a desperate messenger with news from the nearest settlement, and it all spiraled out from there._

**OooOooOooOooO**

"Damn it! You always win!"

Kotaromaru smirked at his cousin. "Watch it or I'll tell Uncle you've been swearing again."

Glaring, Kyuichi retorted, "You would. Snitch."

"Don't get testy with me just because you aren't smart enough to win a game of shogi."

"I am so smart enough! You must have cheated!"

Kotaromaru rolled his amber eyes pointedly. "There you go again, blaming your incompetence on me."

"Why, you-"

"Mew!"

Both boys looked down at their shogi board to find it was no longer occupied solely by game pieces. A small, furry black neko youkai was sitting comfortably in the middle of it, looking at them expectantly with its wide blue eyes. "Mew?" it reiterated, all four of its white-tipped tails swishing.

Kyuichi snorted. "What do _you _want?"

In lieu of answering, the animal stood and rubbed affectionately against his leg. Kotaromaru put a hand over his mouth to hide his smile.

"Augh! Get your stupid cat away from me!"

"Why should I? He likes you. Right, Aisoku?"

"Mew!"

"See? Although honestly I can't figure out why he _would_ like you…"

"That's it!" Kyuichi growled, "You're dead!"

The hanyou sprang over the shogi board at Kotaromaru, arms outstretched and fangs bared with a promise of mayhem. But the tai-youkai just ducked and watching with growing amusement as his cousin soared over his head and rolled over the ground. Kyuichi recovered quickly, getting up and sprinting full speed at the tai-youkai, who was already running at a leisurely pace around the front of his aunt and uncle's hut.

Unfortunately, the chase came to an abrupt end when Kotaromaru suffered the embarrassment of colliding foolishly with Inuyasha's backside. He had grown significantly since becoming a teenager, so luckily his face did not meet with anything… unmentionable… but that did not stop a mortified blush from spreading across his skin. Instead of apologizing, however, he simply backed up and stood there, arms crossed and features red, acting for all the world as if he had meant it to happen. Kyuichi had rounded the corner just in time to watch the spectacle and was currently gasping for breath in the grass, clutching his stomach as he heaved with laughter.

Inuyasha was not amused. "Watch where the hell you're goin', pup."

"I, uh… We were just-"

"Yeah, yeah, whatever. Just don't interrupt me again, got it? I'm talkin' here."

Kotaromaru looked around his uncle to find that there was indeed a guest present. He was a tall, lanky looking fellow whose dress denoted him as a petty guard, and the notion was supported by the sheathed sword on his hip. The one thing that seemed odd to the inu-youkai was that the man was trembling from head to toe, and appeared ready to faint or cry. He hoped that neither would happen.

Inuyasha turned back to the sentry and cocked his head to the side. "What were you sayin'?"

"My village, sir. It's in t-trouble. We've g-got a terrible youkai p-problem, sir. Nearly h-half the people k-k-killed," he paused and swallowed heavily, "in one month."

Behind them, Kyuichi had stopped laughing.

"I see," the elder hanyou grunted, his brow furrowing. "You want help, is that it?"

"Yes, sir. P-p-please."

Inuyasha nodded. "Wait here," he commanded, then took off in the direction of Sango and Miroku's hut, where Kotaromaru knew Kagome and Miyami to be having lunch. He followed.

"Uncle, are you going to help those people?"

"If we can."

The two of them found a merry meal in progress when they entered the hut, but most of the chatter stopped when the diners noticed the serious expression on Inuyasha's face. The only remaining noise came from Senko, who was mumbling happily to himself on the floor.

"What is it, Inuyasha?" asked Kagome, instant worry reflected in her eyes.

"Youkai trouble in a nearby village."

Miroku stood. "I take it you already made up your mind to go?"

The hanyou snorted. "Haven't you?"

The monk smiled.

"I'll go as well," said Sango, who was once again able to travel safely.

"What about you, wench?" asked Inuyasha, looking at his mate. "You coming?"

"Yes, of course," Kagome replied.

The adults all began leaving the room, each headed off to prepare, but Kotaromaru stopped them.

"Can I go, too?"

He noticed the immediate flicker of protest on his aunt's face and ignored her, looking straight at his uncle. Although he loved Kagome, she tended to treat him like he was still young, at times, and he wanted to prove he wasn't. Inuyasha regarded him carefully, using the same piercing stare he always did when making a big decision. Finally, he jerked his head down once.

"But, Inuyasha!"

"He's old enough now, Kagome. You can't use that excuse anymore."

The miko's aura seemed to swell; Kotaromaru could feel it building and knew what was coming.

"That is beside the point!" she yelled. "It's dangerous and he's our nephew and as his guardians we have the responsibility to keep him safe and-"

"Keh! You forgettin' something, wench? By the time you were his age you were runnin' all around the country fightin' tons o' youkai, and you weren't half as prepared as he is!"

A brighter shade of red could not be found than the one on the miko's visage then. "I only ended up doing that because _you_ forced me, Inuyasha!"

"Well he's askin', and I'm sayin' yes. End of discussion." The hanyou stomped past his mate and out into the village without a backwards glance.

Kotaromaru broke into a smile, simultaneously feeling gratitude for his uncle and slight remorse for his aunt. He didn't like making her angry, but Inuyasha was right. He was ready to do something like this; he had been preparing for years. After all, these lands truly belonged to him, and if there was trouble it was his duty to make sure it was extinguished. A hands-on experience was exactly what he needed.

Sango's voice was thick with cajoling as she said to her friend, "It'll be fine, Kagome. He can team up with Yoshio, and they'll cover each other."

Another spark of joy ignited in the tai-youkai's chest. Yoshio was going - but it made sense, as the boy was training to be a taiji-ya like his mother.

"Yes," Miroku added, "And Shippo can keep an eye on the both of them."

Kagome huffed, her signal for, 'I'm still angry but I guess you're right and I'm just not willing to admit it yet,' and headed in the same direction Inuyasha had left, the monk and demon slayer in tow.

Soaking up his small victory, Kotaromaru did not move for almost a minute. When he finally came to his senses it was with an unpleasant jolt as he realized he could hear more shouting. This time, however, the tones were both distinctly male. He left the hut and followed the yells to the weapons shed.

Before him stood Inuyasha and Kyuichi, shoulders squared, ears flattened, standing several feet apart and each one looking fierce.

"It's not fair! I want to go too!"

"Well you can't!"

"I should be allowed! I'm just as strong as he is and-"

"You're not old enough, pup. That's it."

"I've been training way longer than him!"

"I said, 'that's it', now drop it!"

"No!" Kyuichi's face was blotchy red; Kotaromaru had never seen him so upset. "I will not! This isn't fair! Every time something happens _he_ always gets to know about it! You _never_ let me do anything!"

His expression growing more disgruntled by the second, Inuyasha growled, "I do so. But you're not going. Now shut it."

"You do _not!_" Kyuichi screamed, and Kotaromaru was astonished to see that his cousin's eyes were glassy and wet. "It's always _him! _You should just make him your son and then you would have a reason to _ignore me!_"

Inuyasha looked like he had been slapped in the face. The scene had attracted all sorts of spectators and almost all of them had slapped their hands over their mouths. The shaking, distraught young hanyou was breathing heavily but Kotaromaru could scarcely hear the noise over the pounding coming from his chest.

"Kyuichi…" His uncle said quietly, the name sounding like a plea and an apology. But the boy had already turned and run through the crowd and out of sight into the forest.

After sparing a meaningful glance in Kagome's direction Inuyasha sprinted after him. With his departure the onlookers seemed to melt away, each one of them returning to their daily tasks while whispering under their breath about what had transpired. His family trudged off to their huts to wait but Kotaromaru was rooted to the spot, unable to comprehend how this had come to be.

It was true that he had long regarded Inuyasha as the closest thing to a father he would ever have, and he had known for sometime that the hanyou cared for him like a son. But to think that their relationship would come between the actual father and son and not something Kotaromaru had ever considered. Kyuichi was very much like his sire - brash, tough, and hot headed. It was very rare that he did anything blatantly compassionate, like tell his mother he loved her, and he never, ever admitted weakness. For him to reach the point of crying was unheard of, and this phenomenon was what let the tai-youkai know the situation was far beyond serious.

It truly had never been his intention to ever usurp Kyuichi as Inuyasha's son. Being without a father himself, Kotaromaru knew the feeling it created, and would never have wished such a circumstance upon anyone, even the insensitive and wild Kyuichi. Considering their personalities, the tai-youkai had always just assumed the reason that Inuyasha and his eldest child never seemed close was because they simply weren't prone to showing it.

But now Kotaromaru realized his mistake. He had not taken the feelings of his younger cousin into account, had only been concerned with being close to his uncle because the hanyou was all he had to look to. His smooth brow furrowed in distress. What should he do to fix this? Was there anything he _could_ do? Surely Kyuichi hated him now, and what would Inuyasha think? Would he blame his nephew for the ostracism of his son? Panic began to well in his chest like a storm cloud. If that happened he would just _die-_

"Kotaromaru."

Gasping at the unexpected sound, the inu-youkai whirled around to see, to his complete shock, Inuyasha and Kyuichi standing side by side.

"Pack a bag, pup. We're leaving soon," the older hanyou ordered gruffly; his voice sounded rough but not condescending or angry. And before Kotaromaru could respond he was striding past him and had disappeared into his home.

Kyuichi cleared his throat.

Kotaromaru found that his body was incredibly reluctant to face the boy. He did not know if he was able to do so. What could he say?

As he was frantically searching for an acceptable apology or sentiment, however, he was released of the need to do so, for Kyuichi beat him to it.

"I'm sorry."

Kotaromaru's golden eyes widened and he froze again, caught off guard.

"I know you aren't trying to steal him from me or anything… And it's not like you have a dad to talk to or anything… So I get why you need him…"

The tai-youkai had not really felt the need to cry in quite a while, but suddenly the familiar old feeling came washing back upon him like a rolling wave, and he had to fight to keep the tears from making it past his eyelids. He knew that if Kyuichi kept talking he wouldn't be able to stop them anymore, so he did the only thing he knew would shut his cousin up.

He hugged him. Sort of.

The one-armed embrace was awkward and stiff for a moment, but it successfully halted Kyuichi's little speech.

"Wha…?"

Kotaromaru cleared his throat to rid it of the knot that had gathered there. "I… I'm sorry too."

The hanyou blinked, turned red, and then firmly - but gently - pushed Kotaromaru away. "Keh! You don't have to get all sappy about it!"

The inu-youkai could not help what slipped out of his mouth then. The moment was too perfect. "Awww! Come on, wittle bitty cousin! We need to start bonding! Hug me!" He lunged for Kyuichi but missed when the other boy scrambled backwards with a look of terror.

"Augh! You've been around Miroku too much, you weirdo!"

"You know you love me, Kyu!"

"Sick! Dad! Get him away from me! Help!"

"Come back! I just want a hug!"

"_Help!_"

**OooOooOooOooO**

_I remember - embarrassingly - chasing my cousin around the village for maybe five minutes before Uncle Inuyasha came outside and stared at both of us like we had gone mad. "Pups…" he muttered, before abruptly going back into the hut._

_After that we both collapsed in the dirt and laughed until our sides were sore, over everything and nothing all at once. That was the first day I ever really appreciated my cousin for sharing his life, his home, and his family with me. We definitely got along better following that event, although I never dared hug him again, which I'm sure he's grateful for._

_When we had finished rolling on the ground, I went to prepare a pack for our trip. I came across Hani while doing so, and he immediately insisted upon accompanying us. We two met the rest of our traveling party - Uncle, Aunt Kagome, Miroku, Sango, Shippo, and Yoshio - at Goshinboku. We were also joined by the guard who had delivered the invitation, who would act as our guide to his home._

_The journey itself was short, no more than half a day of swift walking with a short dinner break incorporated into it. Yoshio, Shippo, and I chatted amicably most of the while, until we came to a small forest that, according to the human guard, meant we were only twenty minutes away from our destination. There, all talking ceased. _

_I know every single one of us could taste the carnage in the air. The atmosphere was thick with it. If you have never been to the scene of a recent or large murder, then you will not be able to comprehend the feeling of strolling into one. Death carries a unique scent all its own, a lingering miasma that clings to flesh and cloth and wind. For a youkai such as myself, it can be smothering. I had never seen battle, had killed nothing bigger than a rabbit running in the underbrush. Not ten steps into the forest and I was already choking on the hideous smog. Beside me, Hani instructed that I lift my arm to my mouth and breathe through the sleeve of my haori. I did, and that small relief allowed me to make it the rest of the way through the trees._

_I almost wish I had not stepped out on the other side._

**OooOooOooOooO**

The small settlement, a tiny farm-based society with perhaps a hundred citizens in it, reeked of blood and youkai. It was evident from the deserted streets and fields that the place was in a siege of high alert. Trembling, nervous guards stood watch, dotted regularly along the border of the houses. One of them spotted their group some dozen yards from the boundary and ran up to them, sword at the ready in case their presence was a trap.

The new guard whispered something under his breath to his fellow, who responded in turn, and a second later they were being escorted through the streets to the small castle that was erected in the center of the village. Kotaromaru surveyed his surroundings as he walked, and every so often he caught a glimpse of a terrified face peeking out from the window of a hut.

The feeling in the castle was tense, almost as thick as the aura in the forest. It was setting the tai-youkai on edge; he wanted to sink his claws into something - maybe a pillow or a blanket - and tear it apart. Instead he clenched his fists and tried to ignore the frightened stares he was receiving.

The village leader met them in his quarters, where tea was served. The man was middle-aged and balding. He looked stressed to his limits, like any bad news at all would shove him off the edge of the precipice he was faltering on.

"Please, sit down," he said when they arrived. "I'm sorry we do not have any food to offer you. What with our current… situation… It has become increasingly difficult to tend the fields."

Miroku bowed his head. "Oh no, sir, do not worry about us. We're quite all right already."

The headman smiled in a strained way. "I am glad. But now I'm afraid we should discuss your purpose here." His face grew grim. "As I'm sure you're aware, we have a youkai problem."

"No kidding. I could smell the damn bastards all the way here," declared Inuyasha with a scowl.

"Yes, well, you see… A long time ago, this land was home to a terrible youkai lord who called himself the Raimei no Ouja."

'_Raimei no Ouja?' _thought Kotaromaru. '_The Thunder King… I've never heard of him.'_

"He was a terrible form with the power to call a monstrous storm from out of thin air. All manner of other thunder youkai flocked to him, hoping to earn a place in his quickly growing territory. He and his underlings terrorized the surrounding forests until no creature dared venture through them.

"But then, half a century ago, my grandfather, who was a great and powerful general for an influential lord, came to this place and fought with an army against the beast. He killed the Raimei no Ouja and brought its head to his lord, who named him head of this village. It grew into a small but successful community, and we have lived in peace here for decades now. That is, until just last month…"

The man's eyes became shadowed with the darkness of an unpleasant memory. "Some of the youkai's followers survived the attack on their hoard. They've regrouped their forces and now they are back for revenge! They have already killed nearly half my people! This… This is why I called upon you. You must help us before we are completely obliterated."

Inuyasha regarded the headman's pleading gaze for a second or two; Kotaromaru hoped he would agree to help. He really didn't want these helpless humans slaughtered anymore, even if they did technically steal their home from someone else. Finally, the hanyou nodded.

"Fine. We'll do it. When do these youkai normally make their move?"

"At dawn. And thank you!"

"Yeah, yeah. At sunrise, eh? Okay. You got somewhere for us to rest till then? An extra room or something?"

The village leader looked somewhat perplexed. "Er… My home is not all that spacious…"

"There's only eight of us. You can't fit us in one measly room? I definitely don't see any of your villagers doin' it." Inuyasha snorted, and Kotaromaru was inclined to agree. He suspected the last thing those people wanted to do was house a couple youkai, a hanyou, and their companions in their huts.

"This is all you brought?" the man asked, craning his head around as though he expected to see more guests hiding behind them. "I thought, perhaps, you had a bigger force waiting outside…?"

"Keh! Why would we do that?"

"Maybe you misunderstood me…? These adversaries you will face are dangerous! It was only with a few well trained leagues of men that my own grandfather managed to defeat-"

"I understood you just fine. But trust me; we're more than a match for whatever weak youkai are hidin' in those woods."

Their host looked rather doubtful, but Inuyasha had such an arrogant sneer upon his visage that he likely no longer wished to argue. Instead he nodded and instructed one of his servants to show them all to an unused bedroom.

After they had settled, laying their sleeping mats down strategically so that they would all fit in the somewhat cramped space, Inuyasha, Miroku, Sango, and Kagome began discussing their duty. The remaining four sat around and listened intently, not wanting to miss a single detail. Ultimately their plan became to have the village fortified as best as could be done very early in the morning, before the moon had even sunk below the horizon. Then the eight of them would wait on the outside of the protection and face the youkai when they came - Kotaromaru and Yoshio staying back a bit with Shippo so they wouldn't have to fight as often, if at all. It was a simple plot and easy to remember; Kotaromaru only hoped it would go off without a hitch and they would be victorious.

"We should all lay down for a while before we have to start the preparations," said Sango, fluffing her pillow.

"Yes, we want to be on our toes," added her husband.

"I'll keep watch while you all sleep," Hani offered. "I'll wake you when the time comes."

"Are you sure?" Kagome cocked her head to the side. "Won't you be tired?"

The youkai smiled. "Not at all, Kagome-san. I'm an owl, after all. We are creatures of the night."

Inuyasha nodded. "Right. You do that. Remember to get us up on time."

"Of course."

With that settled, the entire group save for Hani spread out on their mats and attempted to sleep. Kotaromaru was having a hard time of it. He rolled over several times, trying to find a way to lay that would allow him to stretch his legs without kicking Yoshio below him or hitting his head on his aunt above him. He had grown considerably over the years and such a small arrangement did not suit him at all.

After a long, frustrating hour, he finally drifted into an uneasy state of unconsciousness that was filled with thunder and tears and shogi boards.

**OooOooOooOooO**

It seemed like only a minute had passed before Kotaromaru was being gently prodded awake by his advisor. Sleepily he trudged out of the castle with his family, Danryokusei slung over his shoulder. The moment he stepped outside into the dark, however, he was snapped from his stupor. The late winter air was cool and a big change from the warmth of his mat. The contrast struck him immediately and effectively helped him shake the lingering languor from his bones.

The eight of them ordered all the village guards to gather anything and everything they could use to act as a barrier around the homes. The men scurried about and finally returned with logs they had not burned during the colder months, big stones from a nearby stream bed, and other more random items like barrels and wheelbarrows.

Kotaromaru was handed five large logs and instructed to start constructing a makeshift fence around the east of the town. He headed in that direction with his load held somewhat awkwardly in his arms. The early morning was quieter than usual; no birds chirped, no crickets sang. All the villagers were fast asleep in their rooms, or at least pretending to be. The crescent moon winked at him from low in the sky. It too was ready to go into hiding.

A flash - like captured starlight - caught Kotaromaru's eye, and he looked in the direction it had come from. He caught his breath and nearly dropped all the logs he was carrying.

There was a house no more than five yards beside him. It was plain and certainly not noteworthy. From the strange and somewhat daunting contraptions sitting outside of it he guessed perhaps it was the home of some sort of eccentric. But it was not the home itself that had stunned him, no. Rather, it was the girl who stood in its doorway.

_No._ This was not a girl. This was a _woman_.

She was tall for a female, approximately Kotaromaru's height, and thin, but not scrawny. Though she was dressed in heavy winter kimonos the inu-youkai could clearly distinguish the impressive curves she possessed. Her eyes, just barely visible in the twilight and from this distance, were deep and dark, and settled on him.

And her _hair._ It was this which had caught and reflected the light he had seen earlier, no doubt. It was long, barely brushing the top of her thighs, and glossy. Her locks were so black that in the weak rays cast by the moon they appeared blue. This woman, this angel, whoever she might have been, was _beautiful_.

Kotaromaru stared at her, unable to look away. She met his gaze unwaveringly. He wanted to speak, to approach her and ask if maybe she knew what the strange, broiling creature in his gut was, and if she felt it as well. Surely such a feeling was too big for him alone to contain?

She shifted on her feet, and a wave of that impossible black hair fell off her shoulder, exposing the creamy white skin of her neck. It looked so smooth that the tai-youkai suspected it might be made of milk. If only he could just taste it…

A long, drawn out whine escaped into the air, and with a jolt he realized the noise was coming from him. The woman noticed it as well, and she _smiled-_

"Oi! Pup! What're you just standing around for? We gotta get those things in place before the sun comes up!"

Kotaromaru jumped, startled, and promptly let his grip slip from the logs, causing them to tumble to the ground. His cheeks flushed and he grimaced at his uncle. "I, um… Thought I saw something… Strange… In the woods…" His miserable explanation carried off and Inuyasha just shook his head.

"I don't sense anything."

"It was, um… A rabbit…"

"Whatever. Just pick those things back up and come help me." The hanyou stomped off with his own set of logs in hand.

Kotaromaru waited until his uncle was a decent distance away before whirling around to look at the hut, but his gaze was met with nothing but an empty doorway. The woman was gone. Trying to hide his disappointment, he went about his original task and put her in the back of his mind.

An hour later the sun was beginning to break the horizon. The air had warmed and with the help of the guards the fortifications were all completed. According to the captain of the guard the youkai normally attacked from the north, so that is where the eight of them waited.

Kotaromaru looked along the border at all of them: Sango, dressed in her taiji-ya gear and wielding the enormous Hiraikotsu. Miroku was next, a handful of ofuda ready in his grip. Inuyasha stood in the middle, Tetsusaiga drawn and chin held high while Kagome and her sacred bow and arrows were prepared to defend them on his right. And all the way at the other end was Hani, who had borrowed one of the village's swords.

Next to the inu-youkai was Yoshio, wearing garb similar to his mother's. His weapon, a scythe-like blade attached to a chain that had once belonged to his uncle, was gleaming dangerously in his hands. Shippo was standing in front of them both, a grin on his youthful face. "Just like old times," he muttered.

Another hour passed, and then one more, and nothing had yet to happen that was even remotely out of the ordinary.

"Where the hell are these youkai?" Inuyasha growled, stamping his foot impatiently.

"They probably want to surprise us," Sango said, scanning the forest.

"Maybe they won't come today," said Kagome, frowning.

"They'd better. We didn't do all this work for nothin'."

"Now, now, Inuyasha, let's just be pa-"

But before Miroku could finish placating the hanyou he was cut off by an ear-shattering _crack_ and the accompanying bolt of lightning that struck the ground right in front of him. The thawing dirt flew out into heavy chunks that soared in all directions, nearly rocketing into the monk's head.

"Miroku! Are you okay?"

"Fine, Sango!" he yelled, jumping backwards.

"They're in the trees!" exclaimed Kagome. She was right. Another bolt shot out of the foliage and almost fried Hani, who dodged just in time.

"Damn cowards," snarled Inuyasha. "Get out here and fight us!"

A wicked cackle rose from the forest that chilled Kotaromaru to the bone. He could feel the presence of the youkai who was attacking them. It was strong. Only ever so discernable were the auras of their opponent's minions, weaker but nonetheless a threat.

"You will regret getting involved with us, hanyou!" the evil voice roared. "We are the Thunder Clan and we answer to no one!"

"Keh! Come on out and I'll let you answer to my Tetsusaiga, you hag!"

There was a screech - Kotaromaru struggled to stop his hands from discarding his halberd and shielding his ears - and then the trees positively _exploded_.

It was as though an entire thunderstorm had ravaged that small section of the forest. Severed trees were cast into the sky and once Kotaromaru was forced to move or else be crushed under errant branches. Enormous dust clouds loomed over them, impairing their vision. The young tai-youkai put a hand over his mouth and tried not to breathe the stuff in. Around him the sounds of a battle were starting to emerge: the clash of blades, a roar of fury, a scream of pain. Shippo had placed a firm hand on his shoulder - and he assumed one on Yoshio's as well - to hold him in place.

But the dust was starting to settle, and Kotaromaru had his sight back. He gasped. Miroku and Sango each had one youkai occupied. Hani was holding off two. Yet another was walking in slow, predatory circles around Kagome, watching her arrow with intense caution. And though these youkai were fearsome enough in their own right, none compared to the giant of a female who was fighting Inuyasha. She was easily ten feet tall, Kotaromaru noted with trepidation. Sparks were flying off her in all directions as she swiped and charged at the hanyou. Once, before the inu-youkai looked away, he saw one of her monstrous hands come down in an arch, missing the chance to crush his uncle by mere inches.

There was a tortured howl and it became apparent that Miroku had managed to expel his attacker, but he only had to look forward to one more coming at him. Numerous such youkai waited on the edges of the skirmish, watching for a chance to replace a fallen comrade. Kotaromaru was worried that soon their propriety would run out, or else their patience would, and the beasts would all just swarm their small force at once. And as of yet, none of the Thunder Clan had noticed the other three onlookers present - Kotaromaru, Yoshio, and Shippo were apparently quite safe positioned behind the formidable form of Inuyasha, but the former wondered how long that would last as well.

"_Wind Scar!_"

The attack burst forth from the Tetsusaiga like a glowing tidal wave, swallowing everything in its path, including the wailing youkai giantess. Overshooting its mark, the Wind Scar even managed to engulf several other members of the Clan. This, as it was quickly made clear, turned out to be a monumental mistake. The previously watching youkai - those who had not been obliterated - went livid. Thunderclaps that could wake the dead went off in succession like a fatal fireworks show. The youkai surged forward towards Inuyasha, a virtual wall of lightning and hair-splitting cries. Counting a hasty estimate, Kotaromaru realized that his family was outnumbered three to one, at least. Hani was already bowing under the combined weight of five opponents, and Miroku, three. Sango and Kagome sought to eradicate some of them with arrows and the Hiraikotsu but that only did so much to relieve the other side's numbers.

Inuyasha no longer had the advantage of the Wind Scar; hitting the youkai would mean hitting his allies. Instead he rushed forward to offer a helping hand to anyone he could reach before a group of attackers took him on themselves.

"We have to help!" Kotaromaru heard Yoshio shout. The boy had his eyes trained on the struggles of his parents.

But Shippo did not release them. He was scowling, obviously wanting to join the fray, but would not let either of the teenagers do the same. "No. They can handle it for now."

Then there was a _scream_ -

And in a second Kotaromaru had wrenched himself from Shippo's grip and was sprinting blindly towards his mentor, ignoring every word the frantic kitsune called after him. Three youkai were surrounding Hani - he had already killed two - and one had been able to rip into his stomach. The wound, gaping and red, looked singed around the edges. The skin there was charred and blistering, and the tai-youkai shuddered when he understood: the youkai had electrocuted Hani from the inside.

The owl fell to his knees, hands clutched tight at the injury, making the creatures around him laugh raucously at his plight. One hauled back and kicked the advisor in his tender side, eliciting another yell.

Kotaromaru was seeing red. He just could not get to his teacher - his _friend_ - fast enough. Before he knew what he was doing Danryokusei was over his head and being swung down so fast the wind from the blade whistled in his pointed ears. "_Hyoushou no Bakuha!_"

Droves of ice crystals exploded from the halberd and embedded themselves in the flesh of the unsuspecting youkai. They screeched and whirled around, searching for their new opponent, but Kotaromaru was already in the air above them, gaze on fire.

"_Hyoumenhoko!_" he snarled, tightening his hold on Danryokusei when its weight nearly doubled due to the thick icy sheet that had completely covered its blade. His targets heard his vocalization and snapped their heads back to look at him not two seconds before Danryokusei collided with their skulls with a sickening _crack_. The youkai crumpled, unconscious but alive, and Kotaromaru landed neatly on the ground beside them, breathing erratically.

"Kotaromaru!"

Kagome was running at him, bow and arrows on her back, face contorted in worry and relief. She snatched him into a warm embrace the minute she reached him. "Oh, thank Kami, you're all right."

Shippo was there too, a mix of emotions on his brow. He looked like he wasn't sure whether to congratulate the tai-youkai or smack him upside the head. In the end he settled on staying quiet and glaring at the boy sternly.

"Damn fool pup," Inuyasha was muttering behind him. "Shoulda left 'em to me."

Kotaromaru surveyed the field over his aunt's head. The battle had ended without him noticing, probably due to his fury over Hani's wound.

_Oh._

"Hani!" Once again the inu-youkai was breaking free of an adult's grasp. Miroku and Sango were already at the owl's side, ripping strips of cloth off the advisor's haori and using them to bandage the lesion. Kotaromaru kneeled behind his head and put it gently in his lap.

"My… Lord?"

Frowning, Kotaromaru met the orange stare of the older youkai. "I'm sorry, Hani. I wasn't quick enough to stop you from getting hurt."

What could almost be described as a chuckle rasped its way out as a response. "It is… _my job_… to protect _you_, My Lord."

"Nonetheless…"

"Hush. I am honored… that you defended me."

A handsome smile spread over Hani's sweating face, but Kotaromaru could not return the gesture. Instead he knelt there and did not say another word, not even after their group had moved back inside the castle to recover and join the victory celebration. He found that his throat had curiously constricted and would not loosen. He did not swallow a single mouthful of food the whole night.

**OooOooOooOooO**

_Because of Hani's injury we were forced to stay in the village until he was well enough to travel the short distance home. The time it took for him to heal would probably have been a lot less were it not for the burn damage done to his insides. Suffice to say I did not ask for the details of such a grisly condition and therefore can only tell you that the damage did not lessen enough for us to leave for four days. _

_Most of those days my family spent tearing down the temporary wall we had built, helping the townspeople tend their fields, and picking up the debris from the fight itself. With the rising of the sun came a complete turn-around of the attitudes of most of the villagers, and before we departed the place our packs were bulging with sentiments of thanks. _

_My four days were quite the same; however, it was my _nights_ that differed from the others'. I was restless in the castle at nightfall, and could not sleep no matter how hard I tried. My brain teemed with thoughts of guilt and a nagging curiosity that had somehow survived the trauma of the battle. In the wee hours of dark it whispered to me, "Go to her."_

_And I did._

_The first night this thought plagued me I simply up and left the castle, making my way slowly but determinedly walked around to the eastern side of the village. The side where _she_ lived. _

_She was not outside as I expected her to be, although I was never quite sure why I had expected that in the first place. Warily I approached her hut, eyeing the metal contraptions in her yard with unease. They looked like various torture devices made by an imaginative and cruel mind. I hoped they were farming equipment._

_I will never forget the first time I heard her voice, standing there gaping at the metal shapes with one foot poised to step closer to the house._

"_How do you do?" she asked casually, making me jump so much I almost left the ground. Not, 'who are you?' or, 'what are you doing?' or even, 'why are you on my property?', but, 'how do you do?', as if it was the most natural thing in the world for me to be standing there. As if she had been waiting for me._

_In reality, it was probably I who was waiting for her._

_I stammered out an unimpressive, "Fine," in which I'm sure I stammered more than is healthy for my pride. She smiled and introduced herself._

_Shirue. _

_I think I replied with something at least resembling my name, and the next thing I knew we were walking side by side out of the village and on the border of the forest._

**OooOooOooOooO**

Kotaromaru and Shirue's stroll took them all the way around to the western half of the town and then back again. Surprisingly, after the initial ten minutes, the tai-youkai found himself capable of coherent speech once more. He was, however, reluctant to ask questions or start new discussions lest she find his choices silly and boyish. Instead, he waited patiently for her to inquire upon him. Most of her questions seemed somewhat pointless themselves. She wanted to know if he liked beetles, and whether or not he believed there was a lady in the moon.

She also asked him, to his consternation, if he had ever been kissed, just before he left her at her door. Kotaromaru immediately had to beat down a blush at which he only partially succeeded and answered gruffly, "'Course."

Shirue looked disappointed at his lie, but her brown eyes did not lose their sparkle. "Is that so?" The corners of her lips twitched upward. "Lucky girl," she whispered, then turned and strode gracefully into the hut.

Once his heart had started beating in a normal pattern again, Kotaromaru decided he could not yet bear to return to the castle. Instead, he went back to the route they had walked and sat down in the grass. A firefly flitted around him, reminding him of the shimmer in her hair. Visions of the woman filled his mind, each and every one a masterpiece of feminine beauty.

'Beautiful' was not a word the tai-youkai used often. He wasn't sure how to define it. His mother had been beautiful. His aunt was beautiful. Someday he suspected Miyami would also be. And yet he did not think of them the way he regarded Shirue. She was simply… _magnificent_.

His golden eyes closed languidly. In the dark he remembered every aspect of her magnificence. The confident lilt of her smile, and the assuredness in her gaze. Those pink, parted lips. The curve of her neck and the pale porcelain skin it put on display.

A wandering claw-tipped hand pulled at the knot that secured his hakama and slipped beneath the fabric.

Kotaromaru saw images he knew had not transpired during their walk. The silky curtain of her obsidian colored hair, cool and smooth against his burning torso, slid off her slender shoulders in waves. They were pressed impossibly close and yet there was still too much space between them. Her breasts under his fingers were perfect and oh, so tantalizing.

His wrist flicked and he shook with the pleasure caused by the friction.

That spot, _there_, just beneath her collarbone begged to be tasted and he obliged it happily. He sucked, nibbled, licked, and kissed that spot until he was sure her skin should be as scalding as his, although it remained cold.

His grip tightened a fraction and his pace increased. Breathing became a struggle, and every exhalation was a visible puff of hot air in the night.

Her legs, long and powerful, wrapped deliciously around his waist. She was moving against him in steady strokes, driving him insane. He abandoned her throat to draw breath instead, meeting her unreadable brown stare with his own hazy one.

The pressure in his abdomen was building rapidly. It would be over soon. His free hand clawed at the semi-soft dirt below him.

She reached down and grabbed him _there-_

Kotaromaru's head flung back and he yelled her name brokenly. His hand ceased moving when he came to his high. In the silenced that followed his head cleared, his temperature dropped and he willed his body not to fall backwards.

When his strength returned he stood slowly, found a few dead leaves in the grass and cleaned himself up. Over his head the moon was still present. Dawn was not for another couple hours or so.

The tai-youkai had yet to grow tired, but he decided it was in his best interests to return to the village before someone - like his Uncle Inuyasha - woke up and went looking for him. He did not exactly relish the idea of the hanyou smelling what he had done. Although to be truthful that would not be half as mortifying as Shirue finding out the same thing. What would she think? Would she be disgusted? Flattered? Or would she think him immature for performing such a task alone? If asked… would she have helped?

Kotaromaru did not know which would be more frightening, her refusal to do so or her desire. Surely he wanted her attentions; his actions proved it so, and he would be stupid to deny something so obvious. But if she agreed to… have relations with him, and was then disappointed in his inexperience, how would he handle the shame?

He sunk down onto his sleeping mat and asked himself why he was even pondering the idea when he had never entertained notions like those before. A small, fleeting thought furled up in his mind then that had him more concerned than ever. Perhaps this feeling, this new and irrational sensation could only be attributed to one thing: the culprit that made men do foolish things like fight impossible battles and make unattainable promises. The force responsible for the lives of his uncle, aunt, and cousins, but not his own.

On and on, until the sun rose and Kagome shook him to get up for breakfast, Kotaromaru lay there and wondered if he was in love.

--

**Hyoushou no Bakuha: "Ice crystal blast" or "blast of ice crystals"**

**Hyoumenhoko: literally, "ice surface halberd"**

**Moufubuki: "furious snowstorm"**

**Please note that I do not speak Japanese (although I do plan to learn), and that all of my Japanese terms are ones I've learned from reading fanfiction or have used a translator to acquire. Therefore I admit there are probably mistakes in the names I make up myself, and I humbly ask you to overlook them unless you can tell me how they can be fixed.**

**I am actually quite worried that this chapter sucks big time… Please tell me what you think. Thanks.**

**Disclaimer: **_**Inuyasha**_** is property of Rumiko Takahashi. The original characters are mine. Thanks.**


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